A Successful Divorce: What Does Your Difficult Spouse Want?
You may approach your divorce with a level head and a focus on fairness. But your spouse may make it challenging to have civil conversations about property division or child custody. Emotional manipulation, failure to compromise, and poor communication can all make conflict resolution challenging in a divorce, but having an experienced attorney on your side can increase your chances of achieving a successful divorce.
At Karen Ann Ulmer, P.C., we are skilled negotiators who have ample experience reaching agreements with “difficult” spouses. Here is how we represent clients in high-conflict divorce negotiations.
Understand What Your Spouse Wants
An effective divorce negotiation strategy starts with understanding what your spouse wants. This gives us insight into what we can negotiate.
For example, maybe your spouse is adamant about staying in the house or keeping their 401(k). Focusing on a few priorities gives you room to negotiate without needing to cater to your spouse with every asset or decision.
Your legal strategy may also involve setting communication boundaries during divorce negotiations. If your spouse is being stubborn or difficult, they may not give you much room to speak. It may help to establish a few guidelines, such as each of you having a set amount of time to share your goals and perspective without interruption.
Give Your Spouse a Few Small Wins
When your spouse is being stubborn, giving them a few “harmless wins” in divorce negotiations can be effective. This can help them feel heard and satisfied before you move on to your priorities.
Maybe you let your spouse choose who can spend the first Thanksgiving or Christmas morning with the kids. These issues aren’t critical, but they can give you leverage when you discuss your priorities next.
If you don’t have a strong opinion about them keeping their 401(k) or receiving other assets that are on their priority list, agreeing to these items can also be helpful. Your spouse will see that you are willing to reach a compromise instead of fighting for every asset in your relationship.
Move On to Your List of Priorities
After discussing your spouse’s goals and giving them a few small wins, you can move on to the bigger issues on your list. Your spouse will feel like they have already won certain battles and view you as agreeable. They may follow suit, conceding to your wishes as well.
If your main priority is to keep the kids during the week or stay in the house, present those goals now while subtly reminding your spouse of the items you have already agreed to in their favor. Our attorneys can communicate on your behalf to prevent emotions or frustration from interfering with your negotiation strategy.
Consult Our Divorce Attorneys Today
Achieving a successful divorce isn’t always easy, especially with a difficult spouse. But having skilled negotiators represent you can increase your chances of reaching a mutually agreeable outcome.
At Karen Ann Ulmer, P.C., we have extensive experience advocating for our clients’ interests in high-conflict divorces. Schedule a consultation with our divorce attorneys today by calling (866) 349-4265.
