Adult Children in Your Divorce

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Some struggling couples vow to wait until their children have turned 18 to consider divorce. While divorce might be easier on adult children than it is on young ones, it can still be emotionally challenging to come to terms with. Supporting adult children in divorce can help them make sense of this change and understand that your family is still whole, even if relationships and living situations look different. 

How Much Say Should Your Adult Children Have in the Divorce Process?

Just like any child, adult children should have very little to do with their parents’ divorce. They may have strong opinions about who should keep what property, where you should live, or who is “right” and “wrong” in the divorce. While you can consider their opinions, do your best to maintain emotional distance and boundaries between the divorce process and your kids.

Just because your children are adults does not mean they should be burdened with the emotional struggles of your divorce. Turn to a therapist for support rather than leaning too heavily on your children, who will already be dealing with enough. Also, be mindful about arguing in front of your children, even if you believe they are emotionally mature enough to handle it. 

Supporting Grown Children Through Divorce 

Even adults need time to adjust after their parents’ divorce. Your children may be feeling a range of emotions, such as confusion, anger, anxiety, or all of the above. Offer support when your children need it and give them space when they need time to grieve this loss. 

Many divorced parents strive to maintain a coordinated front, even in the face of their disagreements, to help children understand that they still have a family. Keep disputes to yourselves and try to maintain a sense of normalcy, however you can. That might mean preserving holiday traditions or keeping the family home, if possible. 

Several coping strategies for adult children in divorce can also help. You might talk to your children about practicing self-care, setting clear boundaries with you and their other parent, maintaining good communication, and seeking counseling from a mental health professional if needed. 

Adjusting Estate Plans To Account for Adult Children Post-Divorce

One more consideration, if you have adult children, is that their role in your estate plans might change after the divorce. Your ex-spouse will likely no longer be a beneficiary, which means you may want to include provisions for what property your adult children will receive that previously would have gone to your spouse. 

Meet with an attorney to ensure that your estate plan reflects your wishes and accounts for parent-child relationships after divorce. 

The impact of divorce on adult children is just one of the many challenges that can arise during this process. Karen Ann Ulmer, P.C., helps clients navigate the complexities of divorce while advocating for their rights. Seek legal guidance with family law, estate planning, and more today by calling (866) 349-4117 for a consultation. 

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Emotional Intelligence in Your Divorce

Emotional intelligence (EI), also called emotional quotient (EQ), is a person’s ability to perceive, manage, understand, and use their emotions to guide thinking and behavior, especially in taxing situations. Divorce is one of the more challenging experiences a person can go through, and having emotional intelligence serves to soften the blow. 

You can maintain emotional resilience in divorce by first recognizing your core emotions and any feelings that arise throughout the process. If necessary, seek guidance from a therapist to work through your emotional stress rather than bringing it into divorce negotiations. You do not want to make long-term decisions led by your temporary emotions. 

Emotional intelligence also ties into conflict resolution and communication skills in divorce. By being aware of and in control of your emotional state, you can avoid heated arguments with your spouse and clearly communicate your needs without allowing emotions to take control. 

Why Is Managing Emotions During Divorce Important?

Emotional intelligence in divorce is a crucial component of effective negotiation and mediation. If you are in a heightened emotional state when arguing for your rights or stating your point of view about matters like child custody, property division, or child support, you risk prolonging the process and agreeing to something you likely wouldn’t agree to under normal circumstances. 

The decisions made during your divorce are either permanent or too time-consuming to alter down the road. You want to ensure that the marital settlement agreement, parenting plans, and any other agreements made during this process reflect your actual wishes. Seek to keep emotions to a minimum and make decisions rooted in logic and your actual best interests. 

Emotional Intelligence With Co-Parenting and Post-Divorce Life 

While having emotional intelligence in your divorce is important, EI can also help your post-divorce life. It can: 

  • Allow you to make level-headed decisions when co-parenting
  • Keep you on respectable terms with your spouse for times when you do need to communicate
  • Help you resolve conflicts as they arise
  • Provide you with self-awareness and empathy that you can use when navigating future challenges with your ex-spouse 

If you feel emotions consuming you now or after your divorce, seek support from a mental health professional. Learning self-regulation and self-awareness can provide significant peace of mind during this challenging process. 

Having emotional intelligence in divorce can make the process significantly easier, but so can working with an experienced legal professional. Karen Ann Ulmer, P.C., offers support and guidance for clients navigating divorce in Pennsylvania and New Jersey. Contact us today at (866) 349-4117 for a confidential consultation.

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Is Your Child Having a Hard Time with Your Divorce?

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Realizing that your child is struggling during and after your divorce can be devastating. You wonder how the divorce impacted their mental health and whether you could have done anything differently. Now, the important thing is to focus on how you and your child’s other parent can support them in their struggles. 

Explore considerations for children coping with divorced parents from our legal team. 

Navigating New Health Needs in Children After Divorce

Your child may be facing behavioral or mental struggles due to the stress of the divorce. Or, they may be navigating developmental challenges that would have arisen regardless of your marital status. In either case, begin by determining whether you and your spouse agree or disagree on the diagnosis. 

Sometimes, a parent notices a change in a child that their non-custodial parent doesn’t realize. Sharing your thoughts on the matter and even seeking second opinions if needed can help you stay on the same page as you support your child. 

When one spouse does not agree, they may wonder whether the other parent can force therapy or seek treatment for the child without their consent. The answer depends on the terms of your parenting plan. Your plan should include details about who has decision-making authority for the child, whether that be one or both of you. 

How Do You Divide Therapy or Other Medical Costs? 

Helping kids after separation may involve taking them to therapy or an emotional support group. You and your spouse will need to understand how you will divide the costs of any new medical or support services they require. 

Pennsylvania law generally requires parents to contribute to the child’s financial needs equally. Your child custody and support orders should address this scenario. If not, contact your divorce attorney with questions or to seek updates to the order. 

If one parent does not agree with the new diagnosis or therapy needs, you may face additional challenges splitting the costs or responsibilities associated with this new challenge. Seek legal help to gain clarity around your roles and responsibilities. 

Can You Alter Your Parenting Plan?

Navigating the impact of divorce on your child may require you to adapt your parenting schedule or plans to better accommodate their needs. Your attorney can help you file a petition for modification with the court. 

If you and your child’s other parent agree on the changes and submit a joint proposal for the judge to approve, this process can be relatively fast. If one parent disagrees, you both may need to demonstrate to the judge why the modification is or is not in the child’s best interest. 

You may want to modify the parenting plan to:

  • Include provisions surrounding splitting therapy costs
  • Provide more or less custody to one parent to accommodate the child’s emotional needs
  • Seek sole decision-making responsibility

Knowing how to help struggling children after a divorce in the context of the law and your parenting plan can be challenging. Seek assistance from Karen Ann Ulmer, P.C., to gain clarity around your parenting plan, rights, and responsibilities. Call (866) 349-4117 for a consultation.

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Divorce and Your Health Insurance Options

Divorce may leave you wondering how you will access certain benefits you previously gained through your partner. For example, how will you navigate health insurance without your spousal benefits? Rest assured that you may have several options for securing health insurance after your divorce. 

Exploring your options can help you feel more confident starting the divorce process. Your attorney can also provide valuable advice as you learn to gain financial independence from your spouse. 

Other Options for Seeking Health Insurance

While sharing your spouse’s health insurance benefits may have been convenient during the marriage, this is not your only method of securing health coverage. There are other potential options for health insurance after divorce. 

  • Check with your employer: If you are employed, your employer may offer health insurance benefits. Check with the Human Resources department to understand the insurance options available to you. Divorce counts as a Qualifying Life Event (QLE) for many insurance providers, offering a Special Enrollment Period (SEP) that could allow you to start coverage outside the typical enrollment window. 
  • Explore COBRA coverage: The Consolidated Omnibus Budget Reconciliation Act could allow you to stay on your ex-spouse’s employer-sponsored health insurance for up to 36 months as long as their employer has at least 20 employees. 
  • The Health Insurance Marketplace: If you are not eligible for coverage through an employer, you can explore marketplace insurance, which allows you to purchase coverage directly. Premiums depend on a range of factors, such as your age, health conditions, tobacco use, etc. 

Some couples choose to go through legal separation rather than divorce to maintain benefits like health insurance. While legal separation is not formally recognized in Pennsylvania or New Jersey, it is a lifestyle option to explore if staying on your partner’s health insurance is critical. 

Whose Insurance Will Cover Your Children? 

Divorcing couples also need to consider whose insurance will cover their children. It might make sense for the custodial parent to cover the children through their health insurance plan. This may be different from how you covered them previously. 

The birthday rule dictates which parent’s health insurance acts as primary coverage for the children. It states that the parent whose birthday falls earlier in the year generally uses their insurance as the primary plan for the children. You and your spouse may choose to still follow this method of determining dependent coverage. 

Will There Be a Lapse in Coverage? 

In Pennsylvania, it can be challenging to predict exactly what day your divorce decree will be finalized. It is up to the judge who is overseeing your case.

Setting up insurance to start on the day your shared coverage ends might not be doable. Consider whether there might be a lapse in coverage and whether you want to look for temporary coverage to fill the gap. 

Seek Divorce Assistance From Karen Ann Ulmer, P.C. 

Navigating health insurance after divorce is just one of the many challenges that often arise during this process. Karen Ann Ulmer, P.C., helps divorcees start moving forward. For a confidential consultation, contact us today at (866) 349-4117.

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Out-of-State Spouses and Divorce: Can You File for Divorce From Another State?

It is not uncommon for couples starting the divorce process to live in separate states. Perhaps they have been separated for some time, or one spouse has recently moved to a different state to gain distance from the marriage. However, navigating a divorce when your spouse is out of state might be a bit more complicated than a typical divorce case. 

Can you file for divorce from another state? Here are a few considerations for out-of-state divorce. 

Where Should You File for Divorce?

Divorce cases typically cannot take place in two different states at one time. The spouse who files for divorce will do so in the state that then has jurisdiction over the case. 

Many states have residency laws for filing for divorce. For example, to file for divorce in Pennsylvania, one or both of you must have resided in the state for six months or longer. These requirements might dictate who starts the divorce process in your marriage. 

There could also be advantages to filing in a specific state. Some states, Pennsylvania included, allow for no-fault divorce, meaning you do not need to prove grounds for a dissolution of marriage. Review the divorce laws in both states and consider which would potentially allow for a more streamlined divorce process.  

Do You Both Need Local Attorneys?

Can you file for divorce from another state? You can, but one spouse may need to travel to the other spouse’s state for in-person court appearances. You may wonder whether this means you need to hire an attorney in the state of filing or in your current state of residence. 

There are potential advantages to both options. Hiring an attorney in your area makes it easier to meet with them and strategize about the case. However, hiring an attorney in the filing state ensures that they have the proper licenses to practice in that state and understand applicable divorce laws. 

A good out-of-state attorney will help you manage communication, differing time zones, and other potential challenges.

Service of Process Across State Lines

Filing for divorce requires you to officially serve your spouse with the divorce papers. If your spouse resides in a different state, you can hire a process server in their area to complete the delivery. 

Process servers often work with nationwide networks of professionals to deliver legal documents across the country. They can serve your spouse according to applicable state laws and even help you track them down, should your spouse be unreachable. 

Developing Parenting Schedules Across State Lines

Finally, if you and your spouse share children, you will need to consider how parenting time will work if you live in different states. You may need to use mediation to resolve disagreements or allow the judge to determine a parenting schedule for you based on all relevant factors. 

Karen Ann Ulmer, P.C., represents divorcees in Pennsylvania and New Jersey. We can help you file for divorce from another state and navigate any complexities that arise. 

Contact us at (866) 349-4117 for a confidential consultation. 

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Entrepreneurs Navigating Divorce: Tips for an Effective Divorce Process

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Dividing marital assets can be challenging in any divorce case. But if you are a business owner, you may be concerned about what percentage of the business your spouse might lay claim to. 

Entrepreneurs navigating divorce need experienced legal counsel to advocate for their rights. Here is what you need to know through this process. 

Is Your Business a Marital Asset? 

Pennsylvania law distinguishes between marital and separate property in a divorce. Marital property includes any assets and debts acquired during the marriage. The court would seek to divide these assets using an equitable distribution policy. 

Your business may be considered a marital asset if you launched it during the marriage. Even if you started it before the marriage, its increase in valuation during the time you were married may be considered a marital asset. 

If you have a prenuptial agreement stating that your business is your property alone, you may not need to be concerned. Otherwise, it will likely be subject to at least partial division. 

Protecting Your Business With No Prenup in Place 

Your attorney will help you strategize ways to protect your business in the absence of a prenuptial agreement. You may consider options such as:

  • Structured buy-outs, in which you buy out your spouse’s interest in the business. This would allow you to retain ownership of the business while compensating your spouse for their share of the business value.
  • Trading assets, or allowing your spouse to keep assets like retirement accounts or home equity in exchange for you keeping the business  

Business Valuation and Tax Implications 

You will need to understand the value of your business when navigating a divorce as an entrepreneur. Several valuation methods are common for this purpose. You might calculate the value of the business’s tangible and intangible assets, estimate its ability to generate earnings or cash flow in the future, or compare it to other, similar companies in the industry that have been sold recently. 

For your divorce, you will need to trace the revenue you received from the business and separate it from personal assets. This can help you avoid commingling your business with other marital assets and potentially losing more of its value in the divorce than you otherwise would. 

Also, consider the potential capital gains or other tax consequences you might face from dividing business interests. Working with forensic accountants and tax professionals can help you approach this process strategically. 

Planning for the Long-Term Potential of Your Business

Courts often consider future earning potential when determining the division of assets in a divorce. If your business is in a position to grow significantly in future years, the court may factor this into its valuation. 

Your attorney can help you address growth projections fairly and accurately during divorce proceedings. 

Going through a divorce as an entrepreneur can be complicated, especially if you have multiple businesses. Our attorneys at Karen Ann Ulmer, P.C., can advocate for your rights during this process. 

Contact us today at (866) 349-4117 for a confidential consultation.

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Divorcing an Addict

Addiction can place significant strain on your relationship and ultimately lead to the breakdown of your marriage. If you are considering divorcing an addict, you likely have a strong reason for doing so. Approaching the divorce process strategically is important to protecting your rights and safety. 

Our team will put considerable time and effort into protecting you and your children during this very difficult time and long into your future.  

Protecting Yourself and Your Children 

Divorcing an addict is about more than just ending a marriage. You may also be considering divorce as a means to ensure your safety and protect your children. 

Still, you might feel complex emotions around the divorce. Perhaps your spouse has changed significantly since they began struggling with addiction, and you miss the person they were before their substance abuse became an issue. Or maybe you want to hold on to the idea that they could one day overcome their addiction. 

Through these emotions and thought processes, it is essential to prioritize your family’s safety above all else. In some cases, divorce may be a necessary step to protect yourself, and understanding your rights can help you navigate this process smoothly. 

Proving Addiction in Court

The court may take your spouse’s addiction into account when making decisions about custody, visitation, spousal support, division of assets, and more. Depending on the circumstances, your divorce attorney may help you collect evidence to prove your spouse’s addiction, such as:

  • Medical records
  • Police reports
  • Witness testimonies from neighbors or therapists

Presenting this evidence in court could help the judge make informed decisions about your spouse’s ability to parent or manage finances. Additionally, if you have previously been responsible for expenses like rehabilitation therapy, you may want to bring these up during discussions of asset division and alimony. 

Considering How Addiction Might Impact Custody

Addiction can impact a person’s ability to safely parent their children. The court aims to encourage children to spend time with their parents while also prioritizing their best interests when making decisions regarding custody.

If addiction poses a risk, the court might only allow supervised visitation rights for that parent. The court might also mandate other measures, such as routine drug testing, to monitor the addicted parent’s behavior and parenting abilities.  

The Importance of Iron-Clad Agreements 

When divorcing an addict, there might be a level of unpredictability around whether they will relapse, what their finances will look like in the future, and how their behavior will change. An iron-clad divorce agreement can help protect against future disputes and uncertainties. 

Work with a lawyer to create detailed, enforceable agreements on issues like:

  • Who can make decisions for your shared children
  • Any substance use conditions your spouse must meet, such as random testing
  • What custody and visitation will look like
  • Who will financially support the children

If your spouse’s behavior changes after the divorce, you can refer back to these agreements for guidance. 

Divorcing an addict presents unique challenges. Whether you are navigating a custody battle or sorting through feelings of codependency, Karen Ann Ulmer, P.C., can provide legal guidance through this process. Call (866) 311-4783 for a confidential consultation. 

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Divorcing and Your Spouse Just Spent All the Money

Divorce sometimes provokes adversarial actions in people. If you are going through a divorce and your spouse has intentionally spent a large sum of money from your shared accounts, you might be feeling hurt, betrayed, or angry. Understanding your options can help you navigate this situation and start rebuilding your finances. 

The most important factor here is the date of separation. If you and your spouse agreed to divorce and then they went on a spending spree, your case is much easier to prove.  

Proving Their Financial Behavior

Perhaps your spouse went on a “revenge spending spree” as a way to retaliate against you for initiating a divorce or taking other actions they find unfavorable. Perhaps they gambled away your shared assets or spent a substantial amount of money on a vacation. In any case, the money is gone, and you are likely wondering what steps you can take next. 

Again, we rely on the date of separation – and if your divorce is already filed, then even better.  

Gathering evidence that your spouse intentionally wasted your money is key. Request copies of all financial records showing these activities. For example, your credit card statement will show all the transactions that led to the card being maxed out, along with the dates of each transaction. 

These financial records will help you prove that the overspending was intentional and not part of your family’s normal spending habits. 

Exploring Solutions for Wasteful Spending 

Your divorce attorney can help you explore your options after your spouse intentionally wastes money in your shared accounts or shared assets. They can also petition the court to mandate that your spouse return the funds they spent, and we will work with you to ensure that any available funds are used to compensate you.  

During the divorce proceedings, your attorney can help you request an equitable distribution of assets that accounts for the money spent by your spouse. In some cases, the court may adjust the division of marital assets to reflect one party’s excessive spending. 

Preventing Future Spending and Rebuilding

Taking steps to safeguard your assets can help you prevent your spouse from further unauthorized withdrawals. 

  • Freeze all shared accounts and credit cards to prevent any unauthorized transactions. 
  • Monitor financial activity closely and notify your bank if you suspect any wasteful or extravagant spending by your spouse.
  • Open a separate bank account and start transferring your income into it. Take caution when transferring funds from your existing accounts, as such actions could be scrutinized during your divorce proceedings. 
  • Have our team put clear agreements in place regarding all financial matters as we work to finalize your divorce.  

Divorce has financial implications even when both spouses cooperate fully. You may want to consider taking steps to start rebuilding your financial situation now. For example, you might want to explore a part-time job or a higher-paying career path. It may also be helpful to start calculating whether you can afford major expenses, such as a mortgage or car payments, on your own. 

Turn to Karen Ann Ulmer, P.C., for Assistance 

If your spouse has spent an excessive amount of money from shared accounts, there may be additional challenges to prepare for during the divorce process. Having a legal professional on your side can help you respond to your spouse’s behaviors appropriately while protecting your interests. 

Whether you are encountering a custody battle, alimony disputes, or other elements of a contested divorce, turn to Karen Ann Ulmer, P.C., for assistance. Call (866) 311-4783 to request a consultation. 

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Divorcing Later in Life

Divorcing later in life, sometimes referred to as gray divorce, presents a few unique challenges. The longer you have shared a life with someone, the more interwoven your finances, assets, and livelihoods have likely become. Untangling these matters may benefit from the support of an experienced legal professional. 

Understanding the complications that sometimes arise with this process could help you feel more confident navigating them. 

Essential Considerations When Divorcing Later in Life 

Perhaps you and your spouse are nearing retirement age, or your adult children have recently moved out of the house. Many circumstances might prompt a couple to divorce later in life. When going through divorce proceedings, consider how you and your spouse will navigate each of the following potential issues. 

  • Supporting two households: You and your spouse are used to sharing expenses. Now, the income you previously shared to support one household will need to stretch farther to support two entirely separate households. 
  • Retirement: You and your spouse will need to divide retirement assets that you might have previously planned to share. This reduces the funds you each have available and may delay your retirement.  
  • Alimony: Alimony is somewhat common for couples divorcing later in life. If one spouse earns significantly more than the other, consider how alimony might be a factor in your divorce. 
  • Estate planning adjustments: You and your spouse might each need to adjust your estate plans to reflect your new marital status. You may need to remove each other as beneficiaries, update power of attorney documents, and adjust your life insurance policies. 
  • Adult children: If you and your spouse were planning to pay for major expenses such as college or weddings for adult children, talk about how you will approach these costs when separated. 

Consider Alternative Dispute Resolution for “Late Life” Divorce

Some couples who divorce later in life benefit from alternative dispute resolution methods as opposed to going to court and allowing a judge to make major decisions for them. For example, divorce mediation encourages you and your spouse to discuss and reach a mutual agreement on issues such as the division of assets and alimony. 

Alternative dispute resolution methods are sometimes less stressful and emotionally taxing than going to court. They could allow you and your spouse to maintain a cooperative dynamic after the divorce and avoid the tensions that sometimes arise when going through a court battle. 

How an Attorney Can Assist This Process

An experienced legal professional can help you navigate the many complexities of divorcing later in life. A divorce attorney will help you consider all potential complications in the divorce and explore alternative dispute resolution processes with you. They can review your divorce settlement agreement and identify any potential issues that may lead to future financial problems.

Consult Karen Ann Ulmer, P.C. 

If you are divorcing later in life or considering a legal separation, Karen Ann Ulmer, P.C., can assist with evaluating your legal options during this process. Contact us today at (866) 311-4783 to schedule a confidential consultation.  

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Can You Negotiate Your Divorce Yourself?

When you picture going through a divorce, you may envision you and your spouse each retaining your own attorney and passing much of the responsibility over to these legal professionals. But you may wonder: Can you negotiate your divorce yourself?

Negotiating the division of assets without a legal professional might make sense in certain cases. However, we highly recommend that you have an attorney review your final agreements.  And, if you have any reason to head to court, a Bucks County divorce attorney should be by your side. You want to protect your rights, and with self-representation, you might risk overlooking important legal considerations that could have financial implications. 

Benefits of Negotiating Your Divorce Yourself

For divorcing couples wanting to save money, it can be helpful to make preliminary agreements.  

This may save you a significant amount of time, especially if you and your spouse can reach a consensus fairly quickly.

  • It gives you and your spouse full control over certain outcomes in your divorce case without involving outside parties.
  • It saves you money on attorney’s fees. 

If you and your spouse are filing for an uncontested divorce, meaning you agree on all matters in the divorce case, you might be able to navigate the process without an attorney. 

However, we also caution you to really think through what you are agreeing to. The plan your spouse presents to you might seem equal and fair, but if your spouse had help with it, there may be an imbalance of knowledge or power. 

Potential Downsides of Negotiating Your Own Divorce

Sometimes, a pro se divorce, a divorce in which you represent yourself, could prevent you from achieving a favorable outcome. It could also lead you to overlook potential issues that might cause negative financial consequences. 

For example, perhaps your spouse agrees to give you the family home, but she is going to keep her entire retirement savings, including pension benefits.  

While you may be thrilled with the idea of keeping the home, you would walk away with an asset that requires maintenance, and you would have to ensure you can refinance the mortgage in your name. These details are critical to unpack before you sign on the dotted line.  

Your spouse may also ask that you split any debt, including car loans, student loans, and credit cards. However, we want to make sure that the debt is assigned to the spouse who will hold the asset.  

How a Divorce Attorney Can Assist

Attempting to work through ALL of the agreements on your own may only lead to further tensions and consume more time during your divorce process. With the help of a legal professional, you can use tools like divorce mediation to reach decisions on key issues. 

Your attorney can also find problems in your divorce settlement agreement before you file it. For example, how are you dividing assets? Which party will claim the children as dependents for tax purposes? How long will you or your spouse owe alimony?

Working with a legal professional could help clarify complex issues and streamline the divorce or legal separation process. 

Seek Guidance From Karen Ann Ulmer, P.C.

Can you negotiate your divorce yourself? You can, but we don’t recommend it. Working with an experienced legal professional such as Karen Ann Ulmer, P.C., can help protect your interests, reduce stress, and lead to a better outcome. Contact us today at (866) 311-4783 for a consultation.

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