September Newsletter

We love this time of year as the weather is enjoyable and more time can be spent outside.  We have had some glorious weather here in PA, even as the summer has come to a close.  With your very busy lives we want to provide you with some great information on saving money and having fun at this time of year!

 

Saving Money When Getting Divorced

Many couples fear the divorce process because they do not want to pay high legal fees.  Household budgets are already stretched and the thought of paying legal bills makes many feel they can not afford to get divorced.  In our new blog “Are You Too Broke To Get Divorced?” we discuss this issue and offer great tips to cut down on legal fees. /blog/2017/09/are-you-too-broke-to-get-divorced/


Fall for Single Parents

As a single parent you may feel as if there is just never enough time in a day to get everything done.  Being Mom or Dad while juggling schedules and your career can be overwhelming.  Sometimes you just want to spend a few stress-free and unscheduled minutes with your child and need a great idea. Here is a great list – over 100! – of activities to do with your kids: https://www.thespruce.com/absolutely-free-activities-for-kids-2997490

 

Student Loan Debt

Dividing assets and debts is a significant part of the financial negotiations of your divorce. Student loan debt, acquired during the marriage, is subject to distribution. However, rather than divide it equally, the court may choose that the spouse who earned the degree take more of the debt.  How you negotiate all debt in your divorce depends on your individual financial situation.

 


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Are You Too Broke to Get Divorced?

The financial implications of your divorce can be substantial and you may think you cannot afford to get divorced.  Friends and relatives may share war stories of losing a significant amount of their savings to their ex, paying unreasonable levels of child support and alimony, and paying exorbitant legal fees.  While the financial reality can be hard to face, staying in an unhealthy marriage can be harmful to you and your children. Being reasonable through the process can also reduce your legal fees and ease the impact of the process on your family.  

Why are you financially scared to get divorced?

  1. Legal fees – every client is always concerned about legal fees which is why we readily share ours so you understand costs and billing (www.ulmerlaw.com/Family-Law-Divorce/Affording-a-Divorce/).  Legal fees in your divorce do not have to be exorbitant.  

  2. Debt – if you have substantial debt from school loans, credit card debt, or a Home Equity Line of Credit (HELOC), you might be nervous about taking that debt on yourself.

  3. Two households – if money is an issue now, running two households on your current income can seem almost impossible.  A new job, promotion, or promise to stick to a strict budget can help.

So how can you afford to get divorced and keep your head above water?  It is possible to get divorced even with an abysmal financial picture.  If you are being asked for the divorce then it can seem overwhelming, if not impossible.  When we work with you, we will suggest many ideas to help you afford your legal bills and actually build a financial picture for your life.


  1. The number one thing you can do to save yourself money in your divorce is to be reasonable.  If you and your spouse are going to fight over every single issue and involve an attorney each time, then your bills are going to be substantial.  Divide your property, start to talk about your finances and kids and gather your financial paperwork all before visiting with a lawyer.  Do not fight to leave the other person destitute and do not threaten he/she will never see the children. This aggression will cause problems.  

  2. Leave the emotion out of your decisions and negotiations.   It is best to treat our work together as you would a business transaction, leaving all emotion out of it. Be aware that divorce involves your personal life and, especially when talking about your children, it is hard to separate out the emotion.  We can help you put support in place to ensure that your fear, anxiety and sorrow are also dealt with so you can get to the business of getting divorced as quickly as possible.  

  3. Stay out of court. “Having your day in court” may seem like a good idea as you want the judge (and everyone else) to hear how awful your spouse is or you just don’t want to agree in order to cause your soon-to-be ex significant pain.  The truth is that going to court in a divorce case is a long process that requires many steps which, in turn, means higher legal bills for preparation and appearances. And, don’t forget, the judge will then be making decisions for your family, possibly for the care of your children, and they will be legally binding.

Getting divorced is not easy for most aspects of your life – and your finances are certainly one of them.  Taking a realistic view of your current financial picture, talking with your spouse and agreeing to negotiate will all ease the burden on your wallet.  

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Your Teen and Your Divorce

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All children process divorce differently and your teen will be no different.  They may be relieved if you and your spouse were constantly fighting or unhappy that mom and dad are no longer together.  They may experience a variety of emotions that they are unsure how to handle.  

 

What should you watch out for when raising a teenager and navigating through your divorce?

Regardless of their feelings about your split, it will be important for you to keep a close eye out for the following:

  1. Don’t let them play off of mom and dad:  “Dad said I could do this,” “Mom said you should buy me new sneakers.”  “Mom said that she will pay half if you pay the other.”  Whatever the case may, be do not allow your child to tell you what the other parent is going to do.  Check in with each other.  

  2. Create stability for your children:  Children of all ages need to know their schedules, how things are changing, and that they have two homes with parents who love them.  If you are all going to move then make sure they understand how they will see the other parent, attend school, and see their friends.

  3. Watch carefully and put support around them:  Your children are going through a substantial transition and need many forms of support.  Make sure that their guidance counselors are aware of your divorce so they can talk with the children and recommend a therapist as necessary.

  4. Realize boys and girls are going to process your divorce differently.  If you have a teenage daughter and son make sure you address their concerns and realize that they may have completely different fears causing anxiety.

  5. Don’t badmouth your ex:  Your children have the right to be loved and supported by both parents throughout their childhood.  The divorce is going to be difficult enough, so make sure you do not say bad things about the other parent.

  6. Promote bonds with both parents:  continuing on from #5 – your teen needs both a mom and a dad so encourage him/her to enjoy their time with the other parent.

  7. Listen to complaints but be firm:  Your child may not like the fact that he/she needs to now move between two homes, live under two different sets of rules, and “go see mom who lives too far away from my friends.”  Listen to their frustrations, acknowledge their feelings, but be the adult as they adjust to their new normal.

  8. Help them manage their emotions:  Your teens are going to have to process a significant number of emotions including shock, anger, sadness and even embarrassment – and sometimes all at once.  Make sure they know you are available to listen.

  9. It isn’t their fault – so many children feel that their parents could have been happier if they had been a better child – maybe not gotten in so much trouble, earned better grades, or not have needed so much “stuff.”  If your marriage was going to last it could have survived all of that – and your child needs to hear that from you.

 

When a teen goes through a divorce, communication is the key.  They need to know they can come to you when problems arise but they are going to need to also understand that the parents are in charge.

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Assisted Reproduction

Assisted reproduction refers to a number of procedures that may be utilized to achieve pregnancy including fertility treatments, in vitro fertilization and surrogacy. In vitro fertilization entails removing a woman’s eggs from her body and implanting the eggs with sperm to create an embryo. Those embryos can be stored until ready for use. However, couples should be aware of what happens to the embryos if they subsequently separate prior to using them. In Pennsylvania, frozen embryos are considered marital property and hence, subject to division in a divorce. The Pennsylvania Superior Court stated its position on the marital status of frozen pre-embryos in Reber v. Reiss, 2012 PA Super 86. In Reber, Wife wanted to use the frozen pre-embryos in order to have children of her own whereas Husband wanted the frozen pre-embryos either destroyed or donated for research.

Prior to reaching its decision, the Pennsylvania Superior Court considered how other states have dealt with this issue. Some states have focused on whether there is a prior agreement between the parties concerning disposition of the pre-embyros in the event of divorce and if so, will uphold the agreement as enforceable. Other states have held the enforcing such an agreement is a violation of public policy and have declined to do so. Another approach is a mutual consent model requiring both parties to agree on disposition, however, Pennsylvania did not find this model feasible since parties would not be in court in the first place if they could agree. The approach that was ultimately adopted in PA calls for the court to balance the interests of the parties.


In Reber, the court found that Wife’s interest in procreation using the frozen pre-embyros outweighed Husband’s interest against procreation since evidence established that the pre-embryos were likely Wife’s only opportunity to procreate along with testimony that Wife would allow Husband to be involved and wouldn’t pursue support in response to the concerns raised by Husband. The court did acknowledge that the party against procreation should normally prevail in a balancing test, however, due to the unique facts of the case, the scales tipped in Wife’s favor. It also seems that the court would’ve likely enforced an agreement on the issue if there had been one. Accordingly, parties who intend to undergo in vitro fertilization should draft a clear, unambiguous agreement as to the disposition of embryos upon separation, divorce or death, or else be subject to a balancing approach by the court.

Click here to read more about division of marital property.

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Social Security Retirement

Social security retirement benefits are payable based on the individual’s earnings history as well as age of retirement. Full retirement age is presently 66 years old. The benefit is reduced if electing to receive the benefit earlier. The minimum age to start collecting is presently 62 years old. An individual can elect to receive benefits under the spouse’s earnings history instead. An individual may receive up to 50% of their spouse’s benefit. This does not impact the spouse’s benefit in any way. An individual may elect to receive under their spouse’s benefit if their earnings history was substantially higher.

Even after divorce it may be possible to collect under your prior spouse’s earnings history. There are a few conditions that must be met. First, you must have been married for a minimum of ten (10) years. Second, you must not have remarried. Third, you must be at least 62 years old. Finally, the amount you will receive under your ex-spouse’s earnings history must be more than what you would receive based on your own work history. Electing to receive under your ex-spouse’s history will not affect any new spouse. Retirement benefits may also be payable to your children until they are 18 or graduate high school, whichever is later.

Click here to read more about divorce after 50.

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Steps for Simple, Uncontested Divorce

The procedures outlined below are suitable for an amicable divorce where there are no ancillary issues such as equitable distribution, custody or support. First, a Complaint in Divorce must be filed with the court. This may be your local county court or another county courthouse within the Commonwealth provided you consent to their jurisdiction. The difference in filing fees is a reason why you may look into filing outside of your county. Second, the Complaint in Divorce needs to be served on the opposing party. This can be done informally by having the other party execute an Acceptance of Service. Other options include service via certified mail, return receipt requested, restricted delivery or personal service by a process server of the Sheriff’s office.

Third, you must establish grounds for the divorce. For a no-fault divorce this would be either mutual consent of the parties after ninety (90) days or one or more year(s) of separation. If pursuing mutual consent, both parties would need to sign an Affidavit of Consent as well as Waiver of Notice for the divorce. If doing a divorce on the basis of separation, one party would file an Affidavit of Separation with the court and then serve it on the other party with a counter-affidavit to make sure they don’t object to the date of separation. The final step is filing a Praecipe to Transmit for Divorce Decree. This motion details all the prior steps for a divorce have been properly completed and includes the actual form of decree for the court’s signature if the motion is satisfactory.

Click here to read more about divorce.

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Veterans Benefits in Divorce

Former military members may be eligible to receive a number of different veterans benefits from the Department of Veterans Affairs (VA). Possible benefits include disability compensation, pension benefits, life insurance, educational benefits and more. Veterans benefits cannot be divided as an asset in a divorce case. This is due to the Uniformed Services Former Spouses’ Protection Act (USFSPA). The Pennsylvania Divorce Code confirms this rule. Under 23 Pa. Section 3501(a), discussing the definitions for marital benefits, veterans benefits exempt from attachment, levy or seizure are defined as non-marital.

VA disability payments are non-marital as are any military disability retirement payments. When discussing which benefits should be classified as non-marital, the statute goes on to draw a distinction as it relates to benefits received in lieu of military retired pay. Specifically, veterans benefits may be considered marital to the extent that a service member has waived military retired pay to receive the veteran benefit. This is because military retired pay is subject to distribution as a marital asset so any benefit received in exchange for their retired pay should be treated the same way. Veterans should also be aware that disability payments can be considered as income for an alimony award.

Click here to read more about military divorce.

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One Year Separation for Divorce

On September 27, 2016, the House and Senate finally signed off on House Bill 380 which reduces the separation requirement for divorce in Pennsylvania from two years to one year. This version of the bill had been in the works for nearly two years with its initial introduction to the House occurring in early 2015. The House passed the bill by November 2015. The Senate finally passed the bill on September 26, 2016 after having received it for consideration last November. The bill is presently waiting for signature by Governor Tom Wolf. Once signed, the new law be effective in 60 days. Some parties contemplating divorce may want to consider waiting until the new law is effective prior to filing for divorce to be able to finalize their divorces quicker in the absence of mutual consent.

Pennsylvania will join neighboring jurisdictions who already have shorter waiting periods for divorce. New York, Ohio, and Maryland require only one year of separation. New Jersey and Delaware only require six (6) months of separation. The Pennsylvania Bar Association (PBA) played a significant role in pushing for the passage of the bill. According to the PBA, there has actually been a decrease in divorce since many neighboring states have allowed divorce after only a minimum period of separation. Additionally, a shorter separation period will allow the parties to move on with their lives quicker with less emotional and financial strain as well as promote the best interests of minor children in decreasing the period of uncertainty.

Click here to read more about divorce.

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Divorced With Children: Issues You Need to Consider

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If you are seeking a divorce and you and your current spouse are parents you need to lay the foundation for a happy and healthy future for yourself and your children. When divorcing there are both emotional and financial issues to consider. Issues surrounding children can be extremely contentious during a divorce, but a skilled attorney can help bring together to start working on issues together for the sake of the children.

If you and the other parent can not agree, a family law judge will make final decisions for you. However, they work from the relevant facts of your case, applicable laws and what they feel is in the best interest of the children. It is best to keep your case out of court and work together for the sake of your children.

When children are involved in a divorce, there are two major areas to be understood and considered:

  1. Custody / Visitation

There is legal custody (which covers who can make important legal, health and educational decisions concerning a child) and physical custody (which concerns with whom the child will live, when and for how long). Normally legal custody is shared by the parents .

During our discussions on physical custody, we will discuss where the child is going to spend his/her time during regular times of the year, vacations and holidays. Physical custody can be join which both parents have equal time or one parent may have primary custody with the other parent having partial custody. In some instances there may be no overnights or supervised custody.

2. Child Support

Parents have a legal obligation to financially support their children but must file to receive it. How that is calculated is based on state guidelines. Generally the parent who does not have primary physical custody provides child support payments to the other parent and/or agrees to pay certain bills or expenses concerning the child.

It is important to create an environment dedicated to supporting your children so they remain stable long after the divorce is over.

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Two Year Separation Divorce

To move forward with a no-fault divorce in Pennsylvania, the parties need only allege an “irretrievable breakdown of the marriage” and either consent to the divorce after a 90-day period or establish 2-year separation. A no-fault divorce can also be obtained if one of the spouses is institutionalized for a period of 18 months provided they will likely still be institutionalized 18 months following the commencement of the divorce. No-fault divorce became available in Pennsylvania in 1980 when the Divorce Code was revised. Originally, a separation period of three years was required but that has since been reduced to the two year separation period currently required. Recently, there was a legislative push to further reduce the separation period to only one year.

Last November the House voted for the passage of Bill 380 which proposes amending Section 3301(d) of the Divorce Code to allow divorce on the basis of separation for a one year period as opposed to the current law which requires a two year separation period. At this point, Pennsylvania has one of the longer waiting periods for divorce on the basis of separation. New York, Ohio, and Maryland require only one year of separation. New Jersey and Delaware only require six (6) months of separation. The Pennsylvania Bar Association (PBA) played a significant role in pushing for the passage of the bill. According to the PBA, there has actually been a decrease in divorce since many neighboring states have allowed divorce after only a minimum period of separation. Additionally, a shorter separation period will allow the parties to move on with their lives quicker with less emotional and financial strain as well as promote the best interests of minor children in decreasing the period of uncertainty. Unfortunately, the bill died in the Senate this summer such that a two-year separation period stands for Pennsylvania.

Click here to read more about divorce.

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