Tag Archive for: PA divorce attorney

File First or Negotiate First?

After coming to terms with a divorce, the next part of the process is the negotiation stage. You may find yourself preparing mentally by asking questions as you try to determine a proper course of action. One critical part of this process is the initial filing. If you’re wondering, “Should I file or negotiate first?” you’re not alone. This question looms over many divorcees as they anticipate how the process will play out. Considering the psychological and legal ramifications will help you understand the advantages of filing first. 

You’ve Reached an Agreement, Now What?

If you’ve reached an agreement with your spouse, congratulations. You’ve arrived at the first step of the divorce process: filing the divorce petition. So, should you file or negotiate first? There are myriad psychological benefits to consider. The planning stages provide you with a strong foundation to move forward with purpose. You may also experience an immediate surge of confidence when you file first. Taking this huge step in your divorce proceedings is liberating and can strengthen your resolve. 

The phrase, “strike while the iron’s hot,” rings true when considering the benefits of filing first. This decision is an important part of your strategy, allowing you to take matters into your own hands and proceed with fortitude and determination. In this case, your opponent is your spouse, and like a good game of chess, catching them off guard will only serve to your advantage. After all, you’ve already prepped with careful planning, making certain your financial and other legal concerns are in order. You’ve likely spoken with a qualified alimony attorney to help you understand the mediation process. Throughout your divorce proceedings, your attorney will help you properly negotiate to your benefit, giving you an even greater edge.

The next consideration for whether or not you should file first is thinking about the opportunity it will give you to fortify your assets. You and your partner’s shared assets must be legally separated, including all physical assets and joint personal finances. In this instance, seeking legal advice ahead of the filing will help you protect yourself and adequately set you up financially for life after divorce. 

Why You Should Consider Filing First

Now that you’ve pondered, “Should I file or negotiate first?” the decision depends on your unique situation. Preparing for this critical step by conferring with legal counsel will help you navigate the timing, present you with options, and prepare you for your next stage in life. When you take the step to file first, you’re making a power move. By taking control of the process before your spouse does, you may secure benefits that you might not gain otherwise.

Book a Consultation Today

A consultation with Karen Ann Ulmer, P.C., can help you protect your rights and determine an appropriate course of action if you’re questioning whether you should file or negotiate first. Our team of family practice attorneys serves Pennsylvania and New Jersey. We’re dedicated to providing solutions to our clients. Book your free consultation today, or contact us at (866) 349-4117.

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Grieving After Your Divorce

After going through a divorce, friends and family routinely ask if you’re “relieved” that the process is over. You might smile and nod, wanting to be agreeable. However, the truth for many people is that “divorce grief” is real and very present for a long time after the fact.

This is your reminder: it’s perfectly normal to feel emotions similar to mourning and loss after your divorce becomes final. 

Read on to learn more about healing from a divorce and how it may look for you.

Why You May Feel Grief After Divorce

Even though you may feel initial relief at ending a stressful marriage, sadness often turns into grief soon after signing the paperwork. First and foremost, understand that strong feelings are normal. After all, you’ve lost something in the divorce. 

Almost nobody marries with the expectation of divorcing years later. Some common feelings people contemplate at this time include:

  • Losing the hopes and dreams you had for your marriage together 
  • Recognizing your life with your spouse is forever altered
  • Being fearful of the future
  • Worrying about losing time with your children. 

During this period of divorce grief, some ex-spouses may even regret divorcing. All these feelings are normal and part of the process of moving on.

What Triggers “Divorce Grief?”

When you are grieving, a sudden swell of emotions can catch you off guard. You might walk past a restaurant you both loved in happier times and feel overwhelming sadness. You might see your spouse enjoying time with the children and feel a great sense of loss.

Even something as simple as sorting and keeping divorce papers can spark feelings of grief, so keep track of these triggers. Friends or family can support you as you meet tough situations and work through hard feelings.

How Long Does the Grief Last After a Divorce?

According to Psychology Today, the grieving process after your divorce lacks a specific timeline. Everyone reacts differently, from a few weeks of grieving to several months or years after the breakup. Being honest with yourself about your emotions is a key step in moving forward, so give yourself time to process all your emotions, including grief. 

One of the ways to move forward is creating new memories and experiences, whether it’s trying a new restaurant or volunteering your time at a new organization. Friends and family naturally will check on you and support you in the first few weeks after a divorce. Don’t let them drift away if you need more help processing your grief – ask for help and support for as long as you need it!

Karen Ann Ulmer, P.C., Supports You Legally and Emotionally in Your Divorce

It’s important to realize that your emotional recovery is important after the separation and divorce. It requires an adjustment on your part to move forward with your life. The stress of the divorce process needs time to work through and settle.

Karen Ann Ulmer, P.C., can help legally during your divorce proceedings and chat with you about dealing with “divorce grief” constructively. Call us today for a confidential consultation at (866) 349-4461.

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Seeking Revenge Through the Divorce Process Can Be Costly

People go through a variety of big emotions during the divorce process. Although anger is a common emotion, it shouldn’t solely drive your reasons for seeking divorce.

Are you angrily filing for divorce right now to seek revenge? Read on to learn why that approach may end up being costly for you.

Harming Your Chance of a Fair Financial Settlement

If you are filing for divorce to gain revenge on your spouse, will it affect your financial settlement? Almost certainly, yes.

Pennsylvania divorce laws don’t specifically call for penalties against a spouse engaging in spiteful behavior. However, a judge could treat your claims for alimony with more scrutiny if revenge is in focus. When letting anger guide your actions, someone might choose to fight every suggestion for mediation a spouse makes, and while it’s their right to use litigation to try to receive a fair settlement, it wastes everybody’s valuable time.

You may believe you’re harming your spouse by refusing to participate in mediation. In reality, you’re harming your own position more. Typically, participating in mediation goes faster and costs you less in legal fees in the long run.

Costing You More Than Just Money

If you have children and mutual friends, trying to gain revenge on a spouse through the divorce process can be extremely stressful for these other parties. They may feel like they’re stuck in the middle of a tug-of-war that makes little sense from the outside. When you have clouded judgment because you’re focused on revenge, you may not be able to see: 

  • How you’re affecting your children’s well-being
  • How you’re manipulating your children or loved ones without even realizing it

Some friends will be able to see through the actions you’re taking if you are focusing on revenge. What if they side with your spouse when you are clearly being spiteful and unfair during the divorce proceedings?

We’re only human. If you are going through the divorce proceedings with anger and revenge as your primary driving factors, you may also lose control of your emotions more easily. With the temptation to do almost anything to avenge your failed relationship, ethical behavior may feel like a gray area – and that’s always risky in the divorce process.

If a judge learns that you are lying about your spouse’s actions, you could open yourself up to legal problems and lawsuits. It’s best to sit back and let your divorce attorney do the talking.

Let Karen Ann Ulmer, P.C., Help You Navigate the Divorce Process Calmly

Did your spouse cheat on you, lie to your face, or betray your trust in some way? You have every right to be angry, but using revenge as your reason for filing for divorce doesn’t help your case in court.

Take a deep breath, and have a confidential discussion with Karen Ann Ulmer, P.C., before you file for divorce. It’s important to go through your divorce process for the right reasons. To learn more about affording a divorce or what to expect, call (866) 349-4117 today.

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Follow Your Divorce Decree to the Letter

Your divorce decree exists for a reason. It provides tangible evidence of the terms your spouse agreed to in the divorce. 

You may be tempted to give your spouse wiggle room when it comes to alimony payments, child support, or asset distribution. However, straying from the divorce decree may only hurt your financial outcomes and encourage more shady behavior from your spouse moving forward. 

Is a Divorce Decree Legally Binding? 

Your divorce decree is the legal document that marks the end of your marriage. It also spells out important details about child custody, spousal support, asset division, and visitation guidelines. 

Divorce decrees aren’t mere suggestions for how to behave after a divorce; they are legally binding. Your ex-spouse is required to follow these rules to a T. If you start giving them leeway now, they will only continue taking advantage of you. Worse, the court will assume that you were okay with their behavior, harming your ability to file a motion for contempt of court in the future.  

Once your divorce is finalized, go to the family court clerk’s office and request a certified copy of your divorce decree. Keep it on hand and ensure your spouse’s adherence to every term. 

Enforce the Elements of Your Divorce Decree Precisely

Ensure that your ex-spouse follows all of these aspects of your final judgment closely:

  • Sends alimony and/or child support payments on time according to the timeline in the decree
  • Adheres to all custody times precisely
  • Divides assets in accordance with the decree
  • Sells the house promptly

What If Your Spouse Refuses To Follow This Court Order? 

Your ex-spouse cannot simply refuse to follow the terms of your divorce decree. If they disagree with any of these terms, they will need to request a modification with the court. This is a legal process. 

If you do not agree with their modification request, they will need to present their reasoning in court and allow a judge to decide whether to grant it. Unless your ex-spouse’s requests are reasonable, the judge probably won’t grant their wishes.

Should your ex-spouse violate the divorce decree and not seek a modification, you can file a motion for contempt of court or request an enforcement action. This prompts the court to assess their actions and intervene. If your ex-spouse is found in contempt of court, the court can: 

  • Impose fines
  • Issue a warning
  • Create a new order that makes up for their non-compliance
  • Order your ex-spouse to comply by paying the support they owe, plus attorney’s fees
  • Impose jail time

Your first step should be to have your attorney contact your ex-spouse’s attorney and warn them about your intention to file for contempt of court. 

Contact Karen Ann Ulmer, P.C., for Divorce Assistance 

Do you need help enforcing your divorce decree? Karen Ann Ulmer, P.C., offers compassionate legal support throughout the divorce process. We can help you file a motion for contempt of court or request an enforcement action to prompt your ex-spouse to adhere to your divorce decree. 

Contact us today at (866) 349-4117 for a confidential consultation. 

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Financial Problems in a Divorce – Financial Abuse

One of the more challenging steps in the divorce process is separating your finances from your spouse’s. Nearly every divorcing couple in Bucks County experiences some tension around the division of assets. However, some individuals exhibit abusive behaviors that make this process more arduous. 

Knowing what constitutes financial abuse can help you recognize and address these financial problems in a divorce. You have the right to equitable distribution of property. If your spouse has begun stealing money from your accounts or otherwise tampering with your finances, contact an experienced divorce attorney for help. 

Examples of Financial Abuse in a Divorce

Financial abuse can take many forms in a divorce process. Watch out for any of these shady tactics from your spouse: 

  • Hidden assets: Your spouse may have started transferring money to a private account to exclude it from the property division process, essentially stealing it from your shared account.
  • Running up legal bills: They may use your shared bank account to run up legal bills or even call your attorney incessantly to increase your legal costs.
  • Using a higher income as leverage: If your spouse makes more money than you, they may try to hold that over you to gain leverage in the divorce.
  • Racking up debt: The debt allocation process usually requires divorcing couples to split debt equitably. Your spouse may rack up more debt before the divorce to increase your financial burden. 
  • Wrecking your credit: Any irresponsible behaviors on your spouse’s part could harm your credit, making it more challenging for you to secure loans or other financial opportunities in the future.

How To Navigate Financial Problems in a Divorce

You don’t have to stand by and watch your spouse use abusive tactics to control your finances. You can navigate financial problems in a divorce with these tips:

  • Retain your own attorney: Never share a divorce attorney with your spouse. Retain an attorney who can support your interests and help you achieve a fair outcome. 
  • Limit bank account access: If your spouse currently has access to your private accounts, contact your bank immediately to start the process of removing their access. 
  • Keep records of your spouse’s behavior: If your spouse has been withdrawing money from your accounts, take screenshots of their activity and keep them on file. The more evidence you have of their actions, the more leverage you’ll gain in your divorce proceedings. 
  • Document your finances: Gather documentation for all of your bank accounts, deeds, life insurance policies, and car titles to show in court.  
  • Enlist the help of a forensic accountant: Forensic accounting can uncover your spouse’s abusive financial activity. 

Let Karen Ann Ulmer, P.C., Help You Protect Your Finances in a Divorce

Is your spouse using shady tactics to gain economic control in your divorce? At Karen Ann Ulmer, P.C., we help clients protect their rights in the PA divorce process. We make it easier to navigate the division of assets, spousal maintenance, and other financial problems in a divorce while promoting an equitable outcome and prioritizing your interests. 

Contact us today at (866) 349-4117 for a general consultation. 

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PA Divorce – Forced To Pay for College?

Divorcing your spouse raises many questions about how you will handle future tasks involved in raising your child. One important question you need to consider now is: “How will we handle paying for our child’s college education?”

Some states have laws requiring parents to contribute to payments for higher education. Learn how these laws affect your PA divorce and other considerations you should discuss now. 

Does Pennsylvania Require Divorcing Parents To Pay for Their Child’s College?

Twenty-four states across the U.S. — including New Jersey and New York — have laws about parents financially contributing to a child’s higher education, but Pennsylvania is not one of them. This means that in a divorce, neither parent will have a legal obligation to pay for or contribute to a child’s college education. Instead, you’ll look to your divorce agreement to determine how to approach this matter. 

You and your soon-to-be-ex-spouse have the right to determine how you will split future financial endeavors involving your shared children. If you cannot agree on these issues, a judge may help you decide when creating your parenting plan. It’s always better to work out an agreement on your own or with an attorney instead of letting a judge decide for you. 

Creating a Parenting Plan That Includes College Tuition 

When you work with an experienced Pennsylvania divorce attorney, they can help you create a reasonable parenting plan that covers how you and your spouse will handle financial contributions for college. This agreement must hold up long into the future, which can be challenging. You’ll need to be as specific as possible to avoid confusion and disagreements down the line.

Be sure to discuss all of the following when creating your parenting plan: 

  • Type of school (private or state)
  • Textbooks, room and board, and other expenses
  • University vs. trade school

What If You Don’t Discuss College in the Parenting Plan? 

If your child is only a few years old at the time of your PA divorce, their college education may be the furthest thought from your mind. So, what happens if you fail to address this matter in your parenting plan? 

You and your child’s other parent can attempt to reach an agreement privately about how you will split college expenses, but this may not be wise. It’s better to create a written agreement and sign it in the presence of a notary. 

You can modify your parenting plan by filing a motion with the court. The court can intervene if both parents do not consent to the modification.

Remember that child support obligations only extend until a child turns 18 in Pennsylvania. You may decide to purposefully leave college out of your parenting plan and agree that your child will pay for their own college. Whatever you do, discuss it now to avoid headaches later on. 

Seek Assistance With PA Divorce Agreements From Karen Ann Ulmer, P.C. 

Do you need help drafting a divorce agreement, understanding equitable distribution in a divorce, or determining the custodial parent? Karen Ann Ulmer, P.C., offers compassionate legal support through your entire divorce. Call (866) 349-4117 for a confidential consultation.

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Why You May “Conflict Out” in Your Divorce Case

Divorce attorneys must be very careful to avoid conflicts of interest when representing clients. Unfortunately, angry spouses in a divorce case sometimes use this issue to their advantage, effectively barring their spouse from working with an attorney with whom they have already shared their side of the story. 

Learn why you may “conflict out” in a divorce case and how to proceed when your spouse uses this tactic against you. 

What Does It Mean To “Conflict Out?” 

“Conflicting out” is a tactic used to prevent a person from working with an attorney. When you call a divorce attorney’s office to inquire about hiring them, they will conduct a conflict check to ensure they have not had a conversation with your spouse. 

Sometimes, in heated divorces, one spouse will call every divorce attorney in the area and set up a consultation with them. Even your spouse speaking with an attorney briefly about your divorce can bar you from working with them. Suddenly, you cannot work with attorneys in your area due to a conflict of interest. 

Types of Conflicts That May Prevent You From Working With an Attorney 

Many conflicts of interest can lead to disqualification in legal cases. Attorneys take confidentiality obligations seriously as part of their prospective client rules. If there is any barrier to confidentiality in your case, they won’t work with you. 

Any of the following may also be a reason to conflict out:

  • Your children know the attorney’s children 
  • Your spouse has been divorced before, and this attorney represented them
  • Your attorney has a personal interest that interferes with their ability to represent you fairly
  • Your attorney is concerned about any other “materially adverse interests” 

Under an attorney’s rules of professional conduct, they will not accept any clients that may violate the confidential attorney-client relationship. This is why attorneys complete an initial conflict check process before you sign a retainer agreement.

What To Do If Your Spouse Has “Conflicted Out” Your Preferred Attorney 

If you are concerned that your soon-to-be-ex-spouse will attempt to conflict you out, explain why this would not be wise. Preventing you from seeking good legal counsel will only prolong your divorce case. If you both have access to strong attorneys, you can finalize the divorce faster and move on with your lives. 

But if your spouse has already used this tactic with an attorney you were interested in hiring, document their behavior. You won’t be able to work with your preferred attorney, but the attorney you end up with can use your spouse’s behavior to your advantage during the divorce. This may give you a leg up during the property division or child custody process. 

The attorney you were hoping to work with can recommend other divorce attorneys in your area.

Schedule a Consultation With Karen Ann Ulmer, P.C., Today 

Knowing why you may “conflict out” when hiring a divorce attorney can help you prepare for your spouse’s tactics. Contact Karen Ann Ulmer, P.C., today at (866) 349-4461 for help protecting your rights during the divorce. 

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Co-parenting and Dangerous Parenting

Co-parenting after splitting up can be challenging even when both sides are well-meaning and cooperative. It’s a lot more difficult when navigating co-parenting and dangerous parenting on your ex-partner’s side. 

Courts will always prioritize well-being while protecting children from high-conflict co-parenting. Consider the following when creating a safety plan for co-parenting with a risky ex.

What If You’re Concerned for Your Child’s Safety When They’re With Your Ex?

As a rule, family law courts believe it’s in the child’s best interests to spend time with both parents. However, some signs might tell you that your ex is unsafe for your kids.

Certain things your children do or say after spending time with the other parent could make you believe it’s dangerous for them to stay with your ex unsupervised. In this scenario, stay vigilant and consult a custody lawyer who knows how to navigate co-parenting and dangerous parenting.

Red Flags of Dangerous Co-Parenting Behavior

If your child comes back from their other parent with bruises or other signs of physical harm or tells you that your ex has abused them, you’ll want to take immediate action. However, not all abuse is obvious, especially if your child is too young to describe what happened.

Neglect and lack of supervision are also a form of abuse. For example, maybe your child often returns underfed or dirty from your ex’s house, or you discover that your ex neglects to ensure they take their prescription medications. You may also suspect your co-parent lets your child engage in risky or age-inappropriate activities without supervision. 

Finally, you may feel concerned about your ex-partner’s unaddressed problem of alcohol or substance abuse in the context of co-parenting.

You Must Still Obey Court Orders

While courts focus on prioritizing child safety in co-parenting plans, they expect you to comply with the proper procedures and present solid proof of your co-parent’s risky behavior. 

A seasoned lawyer can help you look into legal options for limiting contact with a dangerous parent. However, you can’t simply withhold parenting time based on suspicion. You could get into serious trouble, and the court may reduce your parenting time.

Document Each Incident of Potentially Dangerous Co-Parenting Behavior

Did your child tell you their other parent pushed, shoved, or slapped them? Write it down and date it. Did your ex-partner send you a text message or voicemail admitting they let the children stay outside until late unsupervised, despite your insistence not to? Save this message.

Keep a personal record of all your ex-partner’s actions that are abusive or could potentially endanger your kids. Then, consult a family lawyer for reliable advice on keeping your children safe.

Dealing With an Unsafe Co-Parent? Call Karen Ann Ulmer, P.C. 

Do you believe your ex is an unsafe co-parent? The skilled divorce and custody lawyers of Karen Ann Ulmer, P.C., can help you handle co-parenting and dangerous parenting, including co-parenting with a narcissist or abusive ex. Call us at (866) 349-4907 or schedule a consultation online.

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Your Family-Owned Business and Divorce

Married couples tend to mix many elements of their lives: friend groups, finances, and hobbies. Some couples go even further and mix their relationship with their careers by running a business together. 

A family-owned business requires unique considerations during a divorce — the two parties aren’t just spouses; they are also business partners. The team at Karen Ann Ulmer, P.C., can help you navigate these legal challenges. 

No Prenup or Postnup? 

The best way to mitigate stress and contention over a family-owned business in a divorce is to create and sign a prenuptial or postnuptial agreement prior to the divorce, agreeing on how the two parties will divide or trade all assets. 

If you do not have either of these documents, you must determine an equitable division of assets during the divorce process. This can be much more challenging, so we recommend hiring an experienced attorney to help you through negotiations. 

Unique Challenges of Family Businesses and Divorce 

Business interests are always tricky to navigate in a divorce, especially if the business owner is the sole income provider. However, a family business owned by both parties presents its own set of considerations. A court must first determine whether the business constitutes marital property and is thus subject to equitable distribution under Pennsylvania law. 

To make this determination, a judge will consider factors like the funds used to start the business and the business’s value before, during, and after the marriage and divorce.  

Who Owns the Business? 

It is crucial to have a complete understanding of who owns the business to determine whether it is a marital asset. For example, if a trust or a previous generation owns the business, and neither party technically owns it yet, it follows different rules for property division. 

Inheritance 

If one party inherited the business or received it as a gift, even during the marriage, the business is considered separate property, not marital property. Additionally, if one party may receive a portion of the business as an inheritance in the future, that portion also counts as separate property. 

Alimony and Child Support 

Many people wonder how the income from a family-owned business will be divided after a divorce. If you are pursuing a divorce, you can use your ex-spouse’s salary for alimony and child support settlements. 

What If the Business Goes Under? 

Some people try to continue co-owning the business after a divorce when considering the division of assets. Others opt to receive a business valuation and have one partner buy out the other’s portion. If you choose to do this, you can receive a lump-sum payment upfront and avoid any financial repercussions if the business goes under. 

There are always complicating factors when pursuing a divorce. Tied-up assets, like co-owning a business, can make an already-challenging process even more complex. Reaching out to a trusted divorce attorney from Karen Ann Ulmer, P.C. can help you navigate dividing a family-owned business during a divorce with confidence. Call or email today. 

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What is the Attorney-Client Privilege in Pennsylvania?

The attorney-client privilege allows a client to prevent the disclosure of some communication between the client and their attorney, their agents, and employees. It is a way to encourage clients and their attorneys to be open and honest with each other because these communications should be confidential. 

But this privilege will not block every kind of communication. Under some circumstances, a client can waive this protection, and disclosure by an attorney could also result in others learning of what was said or written. 

How Does This Privilege Work? 

Pennsylvania law generally protects the confidentiality of certain communications between an attorney and their client. These protections are granted so clients can safely and fully disclose sensitive and possibly damaging information to receive proper legal advice. 

A client can refuse to disclose these communications and prevent others from disclosing confidential communications or information that would reveal a confidential communication. The parties to that communication are not just the client and attorney. They could be: 

  • The client or their representative and the client’s attorney or their representative 
  • The attorney and the attorney’s representative 
  • The client’s representatives or between the client and their representative 

The privilege can be claimed by: 

  • The client 
  • The attorney or their representative at the time of the communication, but only for their client 

The privilege does not cover others who may be harmed by the release. 

What are the Privilege’s Limits? 

The exceptions to allowing some communications to be kept secret include:  

  • If the attorney’s services or advice were sought or obtained to enable or help anyone commit or plan to commit what the client knows, or reasonably should know, was a crime or fraud 
  • Communications relevant to a possible breach of duty by the lawyer to the client or by the client to the attorney 

This confidentiality can be lost if you do certain things or fail to do other things: 

  • You intentionally disclose or agree to disclose the confidential communication’s subject matter 
  • You or your attorney fail to object to the communication’s disclosure during a legal proceeding 

The privilege is not waived if the disclosure is accidental and you and your attorney take reasonable steps to prevent further exposure and to correct the mistaken release. 

How Does This Affect Me? 

If you have retained our services, do not disclose to others any discussions we, our employees, or others we have retained have had. If the opposing party can show you are spilling the beans to others, we will have a hard time arguing to a judge that those are our secret beans and no one else’s. Some things are not anyone else’s business, including conversations with and information provided to or by your attorney. 

This includes not just verbal discussions but anything in writing, whether that is letters, forms, or emails we send you or that you send to us. The possible damage to your case far outweighs whatever benefit you think you may gain. 

Contact Karen Ann Ulmer, P.C., if you have questions about this important topic. Call us at (866) 311-4783 or complete our online contact form today. 

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