Tag Archive for: Pennsylvania divorce attorney

I Don’t Talk to My Kids – Reunification Therapy

Not having a relationship with your children can be heartbreaking. Regardless of the circumstances that led to you and your children not speaking, you can attempt to repair the relationship with reunification therapy. This process could even help you resolve custody disputes and allow you to regain visitation with your kids. 

Here’s what you need to know.

What Is Reunification Therapy? 

Reunification therapy is a form of mental health therapy that aims to restore parent-child relationships. Judges sometimes order reunification therapy to help resolve messy child custody disputes. Courts like parents and children to be involved in each other’s lives, and this is one way to promote a healthy familial unit. 

In many families where the parents do not share custody, there is a “favored parent” and a “rejected parent.” Reunifying the rejected parent with the child and strengthening the relationship often requires therapeutic intervention. 

During reunification therapy, a therapist works with a parent and their child to improve communication and restore the bond between them. Techniques may include:

  • Family systems therapy, which involves resolving conflicts within the family unit
  • Education sessions about family dynamics
  • Setting boundaries and discussing co-parenting guidelines

Reunification therapy is child-focused and moves at the child’s pace. While the entire family can experience emotional healing through this therapy, the main goal is for the child to find healing and strengthen their relationship with the rejected parent. 

Reunification Therapy and Child Custody 

Judges often recommend or order reunification for families going through stressful custody disputes. It’s often a necessary method of resolving parental alienation. Alienation happens when one parent turns the child against the other parent to attempt to secure more favorable visitation or custody. 

After a family goes through reunification therapy, they may be more willing to concede to split custody. The child may also be happier in the home with the alienated parent. 

This process is often slow and involves other steps, such as individual therapy. With these tools, estranged families learn how to restore their relationships while maintaining healthy boundaries. 

Who Needs Reunification Therapy? 

Not having any communication with your kids is a surefire sign that you could benefit from reunification therapy. Your family may also benefit from this therapy if any of the following are true. 

  • Your ex has turned your child against you. 
  • Your relationship with your child has become strained, and the child favors the other parent.
  • A judge has ordered reunification therapy as part of your child custody arrangement. 

Reunification therapy is sometimes recommended in cases where a parent has been in drug or alcohol rehab, and their addiction has impacted their relationship with their child. In this case, supervised visitation may be safer for the child. 

Seek Child Custody Assistance From Karen Ann Ulmer, P.C. 

Gaining custody can be challenging if you don’t talk to your kids. Reunification therapy can help. You should also work with an experienced family law attorney to navigate the child custody process successfully while prioritizing your child’s interests. 

Contact Karen Ann Ulmer, P.C., today at (866) 349-4721 to schedule a consultation.

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Child Custody – What Not To Say About Your Ex

Your emotions are probably intense if you’re navigating a heated child custody battle. Saying something negative about your ex may seem like a good idea. After all, couldn’t it show the judge that you should have full custody instead of them?  

In reality, saying the wrong thing during a custody battle can hurt your case. It can also place more stress on your children during an already tumultuous process. Our Bucks County, PA child custody attorneys provide a few tips on what not to say or do during a child custody battle. 

Don’t Say Negative Words About Your Ex to Your Children

Your children are at the heart of your custody battle. It can be tempting to involve them in your arguments by slandering your ex in front of them. 

Maybe you want to vent to your kids about how rude your ex is. It’s much better to vent to a friend or an attorney than to involve your children. 

Kids become confused easily and don’t need to know the details of your dispute with your spouse. If the judge hears you were complaining about your ex to your kids, they may believe you were trying to alienate them, which could affect your co-parenting agreement and visitation rights. 

Don’t Tell Your Children What Your Ex Did

Did your ex cheat on you? Steal money from your joint accounts? Lie about their behavior? Tell it to the court — not your children. On the rare chance your child is called to testify, a judge will not look favorably on your tattling about your ex to your kids. Your custody battle is already stressful enough for your children without you encouraging them to choose sides or lose trust in their other parent. 

Don’t Tell Lies About Your Ex

You may be tempted to make up lies about your ex in court to prove poor parental conduct. Maybe you believe your ex would be neglectful of your child, but you don’t have any proof of them acting that way, so you decide to make up a story about how they forgot to pick your child up from school. 

If a judge finds out you lied in court, it could have devastating consequences for your child custody case.  

Don’t Be Rude or Disrespectful 

While tensions run high during child custody battles, avoid being rude or disrespectful to anyone involved in your case. Unkind words to your spouse can make their way to the judge’s ears and hurt your case.

You especially need to watch what you say in court. Judges make decisions in the child’s best interest, and if they see you acting immaturely or aggressively, they’ll consider your behavior when finalizing the court orders. 

Contact Karen Ann Ulmer, P.C., for Guidance Through Your Custody Battle

Knowing what to say and what not to say during a child custody dispute can be challenging. Allow experienced and compassionate divorce attorney Karen Ann Ulmer, P.C., to guide you. Contact us today at (866) 349-4721 to schedule a confidential consultation. 

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How Can You Speed Up Your Bucks County Divorce?

Divorce is a challenging process, both emotionally and legally. Many people wonder how they can speed up the divorce process. The time it takes to get divorced will vary depending on a variety of factors, including whether the divorce is contested or uncontested. Here in Pennsylvania, Act 102 changed the waiting period for a contested divorce from two years to one year. After being separated for one year, someone can lawfully file for a contested divorce and begin legal proceedings.  

However, an uncontested divorce will almost always take less time than a contested one — on average, around 4-6 months. If you are looking to expedite the process, we recommend pursuing an uncontested divorce. This means you must agree with your soon-to-be ex-spouse about the grounds and terms of the divorce, including asset distribution and child visitation schedules. 

An experienced attorney can help you navigate the legal system and negotiate a divorce agreement efficiently. You must be prepared to take a couple of steps before beginning this process. 

Commit To Negotiating 

It’s important to have realistic expectations when you file for divorce. With so many legal elements involved, like child custody agreements, child support payments, property division, and alimony, even the most amicable of divorces can lead to disagreements during negotiation. From the beginning, anticipate that you will need to make some concessions. 

Find Emotional Support 

Making compromises during negotiations can feel particularly challenging when emotions are running high. Seek out emotional support from friends, family, and loved ones. Their support can ground you when you feel stuck, making it easier to work toward settlement agreements and obtain a fast divorce. 

Do Your Research 

When it comes to child support and visitation rights, both parties in a divorce have a right to spend time with their children, as well as a responsibility to contribute financially. Your legal team must have a clear picture of your financial situation. 

Share baseline truths about your finances with your divorce attorney. Come to meetings prepared with tax documents and receipts. Being honest about your finances, with documents to back it up, will help speed up your divorce by eliminating future surprises. 

Avoid a Long Battle 

Above all, don’t just accept that all divorce cases will be long, arduous battles. This does not have to be the case and is usually unnecessary. Drawing out the process will cost both parties a lot of money, time, and stress.  

By entering divorce discussions with a fully informed legal team and an expectation that you will need to compromise, you are setting yourself up for a smooth and quick divorce. 

Contact an Experienced Bucks County Divorce Lawyer 

The legal professionals at Karen Ann Ulmer, P.C., are experienced in helping clients navigate the legal systems of divorce. We prioritize clients’ peace of mind and well-being. Call or email us today for a confidential discussion to address your concerns and learn more about how we can help you speed up your divorce. 

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What Should I Ask for When Negotiating a Divorce Settlement?

A divorce allows you to start your life over, but your old, married life will impact that new one. Think about how untangling your life from your spouse will affect you legally and financially. What will you not have, or not have enough of, to start this new life?

You can break down what to ask for in a settlement agreement regarding parental roles and property rights or prioritize your ask based on needs and wants.

What Do You Need? What Do You Want?

Think about your priorities. What do you need, and what do you want but can go without? Nearly all divorce cases are settled without going to trial. That means there will be negotiations (and possibly mediation) between you and your spouse through your attorneys.

In any negotiation, there are things that a party needs (or thinks they need) to resolve the issue. Other issues are negotiable, and you should be willing to give things up as necessary to satisfy your needs. After your needs are met, try to obtain what you want. Ideally, both sides will get most of what they need and some of what they want.

State law may entitle you to certain things. If those laws address your needs, that is great! If not, and you are willing to part with the things given to you by state law (partially or totally), they can be bargaining chips to ensure your needs are met.

It is like a chess match. You must protect your king. All the other pieces are expendable if that means you win the game. In this case, winning satisfies your needs, and you are in the best position to start your new life.

What Role Must You Play With Your Kids?

If you have kids, Pennsylvania law makes your child’s interests paramount, so what you need or want takes a back seat. State law presumes a child needs both parents in their lives.

The more time you feel you need with your child, and the more significant role you wish to play, the stronger the facts and legal arguments must be to accomplish that. Unless the other parent is irresponsible or a potential danger to your child, you may have a tough time if you feel a need to be the sole parent or the other parent should have minimal contact with their child.

Most parents meet in the middle. They share legal custody (the ability to make crucial decisions), but their physical custody or parental time may vary. One parent may spend most of the time with the child, or it may be split evenly.

What are Your Financial Needs?

The distribution of a married couple’s debts and assets is supposed to be based on what is equitable and fair, given the situation. When negotiating a settlement, there is a mix of what a person may be entitled to and what they are willing to trade with their spouse to achieve their needs and wants.

You may need more financial help in the short term, so you may forego the ongoing income of spousal support to get more cash or assets upfront. If you need the marital home, what assets will you swap to get it? Ideally, a spouse who needs the home is married to someone who wants to move away and start over, so the marital home (with all the memories that come with it) is the last thing they want.

Get the Help You Need from an Attorney You Can Trust  

If you think getting divorced may be in your future or have decided it is the next step, call us at (215) 608-1867. We can discuss your situation via teleconference, on the phone, or in our Doylestown or Langhorne office.  

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