Tag Archive for: stress

Stress of Divorce

Fewer things in life are more stressful than going through a divorce. Who will end up with the house? What’s going to happen to your kids? The stress of divorce, and its many unknowns, really can feel like it’s eating you alive.

But it doesn’t have to be this way. Below, find must-follow tips for managing stress throughout your divorce.

Follow the Boy Scout Motto and Be Prepared

What would happen if you were called into a work meeting, but hadn’t prepared any notes or talking points? You’d be pretty stressed, right? The same principle applies to your divorce.

You never want to go into a divorce unprepared. To be forewarned, as they say, is to be forearmed.

Stress reduction starts with preparing yourself for what’s going to come. The more you know what to expect, the more at ease you’re going to feel. That means you’re less likely to make rash decisions that could torpedo your divorce case.

This is why it’s so important to hire a good divorce attorney. Your lawyer can tell you what to expect in divorce negotiations regarding child custody arrangements, alimony, and property division.

Keep Your Organization Game on Point

The divorce process involves plenty of paperwork to fill out and deadlines to remember. It may be unpleasant, but if you want your divorce to go smoothly, you’ll need to treat organization like a full-time job.

Start by gathering important financial documents, such as bank statements, savings account information, retirement account details, and paystubs. Your lawyer will want to take a look at these to determine the fair division of property between you and your ex-spouse. If you have insurance policies (such as life insurance), make copies of those documents, too.

To stay organized, buy a binder and sort documents into categories, such as financial and legal. You can also scan documents and store them in the cloud or on your computer for quick access.

Take Care of Your Mental Health

The stress of divorce can be truly overwhelming and the emotional burden can be difficult to bear. Between talks with your ex and meetings with your lawyer, you might feel like there’s hardly any time to focus on yourself.

However, you won’t do yourself any favors by neglecting your mental health. Find moments where you can relax, breathe, and quiet your racing thoughts. It can help to keep a journal and talk to a therapist about how you’re feeling. And if you have a good friend, now’s the time to rely on them.

Having an excellent lawyer is a wonderful way to manage stress during divorce. Your lawyer will help by:

  • Providing solid advice to help you avoid legal mistakes that could jeopardize your financial stability
  • Handling paperwork so you don’t miss deadlines
  • Guiding you through divorce negotiations and ensuring a fair deal for you

Karen Ann Ulmer, P.C. deeply understands the stress of divorce and will work hard to make the process as smooth as can be for all involved. To schedule your consultation, call (215) 752-6200.

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Overcoming the Stress of Divorce

Stress after divorce is to be expected. You’re embarking on a new stage of your life, but things will be different socially, emotionally, and financially. Looking at the big picture can cause anxiety, but by allowing yourself time to adjust and by taking things one at a time, you can manage the stress and anxiety and come out stronger on the other end.

It’s important, first of all, to allow yourself to feel many different emotions. Do not try to bottle them up. And give yourself time to perform at less than full capacity. You may be juggling new responsibilities, or the feelings themselves may be slowing you down. It’s okay. Don’t worry about what others may think of you, everyone has a different way of coping.

Don’t go through this alone, though. It’s important to have the strong social support of friends or family with whom you can share your feelings and who make you feel better. You may also need to reach out to a support group or professional counselor, especially one who is an expert in helping people adjust after divorce.

Keep yourself physically healthy. Exercise and a good diet improve your mental and emotional health. Get involved in activities you enjoy, indulge in hobbies to lift your spirits.

Positive self-talk is crucial. Don’t blame yourself for past mistakes, real or imagined. Focus on a better future. Understand that you can’t control everything, but you can control some things. Write down everything that worries you and brainstorm solutions. Friends may also have ideas. If there are some concrete things you can do to improve the situation, take one challenge at a time, and celebrate your progress.

Financial concerns can be a major stressor. If your spouse handled most of the finances, you’ll need to learn how to do so now. A financial professional can help you make a budget and suggest ways to improve your financial situation. If necessary, look into further professional training in order to get a job that will bring in more money.

If you have children, you’ll be understandably concerned about them. Give them extra attention and make sure they know they can rely on you. But they also need consistent routine and clear discipline, giving them structure and security during this insecure time.

After your divorce, things will be different, but they can still be good – maybe even better. By focusing on your emotional health, you will be able to cope better and also help your children cope. A good divorce lawyer should be able to refer you to appropriate support services. At Ulmer Law, we are committed to helping our clients not only get the best settlement but move beyond their divorce with the best possible future before them. Call us for a consultation.

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