Tag Archive for: vacation schedule

Holiday Schedules

As the holiday season approaches it is a good time to figure out where children will spend the holidays if you are separated or divorced. A good custody order will include a holiday schedule. Frequently seen provisions include alternating holidays so that one parent has a holiday in even years while the other parent has it in odd years. Another option is splitting the holidays so that each party has a certain time allotted on the holiday itself. This works best if the parties are in close proximity to each other to minimize travel time on the holiday. There could be a holiday schedule which provides for the parties to always have the same holidays every year. In some instances, a custody order may simply state that holidays will be shared as mutually agreed upon by the parties without specifics. This is only recommended if you have a good relationship with the other parent to avoid arguments or stressful last-minute negotiations.

Another consideration is if there are unique family traditions that don’t occur on the actual holiday, such as an annual party that the kids may want to be involved in. If one party usually travels during the holiday season this should be addressed when drafting a holiday schedule. Holiday and vacation time will generally supersede the regular custody schedule, however, be sure any custody order makes clear whether the holiday schedule or vacation provision takes top priority. As a practical matter, parties should try to be as civil and cooperative as possible when discussing holiday time. The holidays can be an especially difficult time for families that are going through separation and divorce and everyone involved will benefit from a process that is as amicable as possible.

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Your First Vacation as a Single Parent

After vacationing for some time as a family, it can be hard to adjust to your first trip as a solo parent. Even if you are happy to be free from your spouse, doing everything yourself and not having another adult around can be hard. Your children may be asking why mommy or daddy did not join you all on the trip and the guilt of your failed marriage may be weighing on you for their sake.

Yes, this can all happen on your first vacation as a single parent. As we process your divorce many adjustments to your new life will need to be made. When bringing the children on vacation for the first time you can employ these strategies to help you through:

Travel with Friends – having other adults around can really help you through your first trip. You will have adult companionship and also have another set of hands to help with your children. If you want to take some alone time you also have an adult who can step in and watch your kids for a few hours. Finding the right adults to travel with now can be a bit difficult – it may be awkward to travel with family and friends who you have traveled with before when you were a couple, so finding the right people to help you through this time may be tricky. You could ask a friend who is divorced with children to come along with you as a group .

Make it all about your kids: When you have younger children most vacations are all about them – they need and want your attention anyway to explore and play. Focusing on your children having fun is a great diversion. Planning an adventure around their interests or even just making sure each day has activities focused around them can pass the time and bring you back to the most important aspect of your life – your kids.

Take a few minutes for yourself: If you have a bit of extra budget and some babysitting support, take a trip to the hotel spa. Other options include a long walk on the beach or reading a book undisturbed poolside. Whatever you like to do take a few minutes for yourself – after all, this is your vacation as well!

Most importantly, remember it is all part of the adjustment. The first trip may be lonely or an amazing experience for you. You may love the new pack formed with just you and your children or you may miss your spouse terribly. However the trip evolves for you remember it is all a time of transition and part of stepping into your new life as a single parent.

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Vacation Schedules in Custody

Vacations are a staple of the summer season and you want to make sure your children are able to enjoy vacation with you. A vacation schedule can be included as part of a custody order to alleviate any confusion or disagreement. Standard provisions specify how many weeks of vacation each party is entitled to per year, how the weeks may be exercised, what type of notice should be given, and what additional information should be provided. A sample vacation schedule paragraph is below:
Each party shall have two non-consecutive weeks of vacation each year with thirty days advance written notice to the other parent. If there is a conflict on vacation where both parties plan the same week, the party who gives written notice first shall be entitled to the week. Written notice may be via email or text message. The parties agree that they will each exercise their vacation week to include their regular scheduled time so as not to unnecessarily disrupt the regular custody schedule.

The parties agree will provide the other parent with a travel itinerary, and names of anyone traveling with the children and provide contact information for how to reach the children while on vacation. The parties agree that if either parent intends to remove the children from the Commonwealth of Pennsylvania for any purpose for any length of time over two days, that he or she will provide one (1) week notice to the other and indicate the destination where he or she intends to take the children, names of anyone traveling with the children, the length of the trip and a phone number and address where the children can be reached. Neither party will be allowed to travel out of the country with the children unless both parties agree in writing or a Court Order is obtained. The parties acknowledge that the vacation schedule takes precedence over the regular schedule and the holiday schedule takes precedence over the vacation and regular schedules so that neither party may take vacation during the other party’s holiday time.

Click here to read more about child custody.

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