Co-parenting and Dangerous Parenting

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Co-parenting after splitting up can be challenging, even when both sides are well-meaning and cooperative. It’s a lot more difficult to navigate co-parenting when there are signs of dangerous parenting on the side of your ex-partner. 

Courts will always prioritize well-being while protecting children from high-conflict co-parenting. Consider the following when creating a safety plan for co-parenting with a risky ex.

What If You’re Concerned for Your Child’s Safety When They’re With Your Ex?

As a rule, family law courts believe it’s in the child’s best interests to spend time with both parents. However, some signs might tell you that your ex is unsafe for your kids.

Certain things your children do or say after spending time with the other parent could make you believe it’s dangerous for them to stay with your ex unsupervised. In this scenario, stay vigilant and consult a custody lawyer who knows how to navigate co-parenting and dangerous parenting.

Red Flags of Dangerous Co-Parenting Behavior

If your child comes back from their other parent with bruises or other signs of physical harm or tells you that your ex has abused them, you’ll want to take immediate action. However, not all abuse is obvious, especially if your child is too young to describe what happened.

Neglect and lack of supervision are also a form of abuse. For example, maybe your child often returns underfed or dirty from your ex’s house, or you discover that your ex neglects to ensure they take their prescription medications. You may also suspect your co-parent lets your child engage in risky or age-inappropriate activities without supervision. 

Finally, you may feel concerned about your ex-partner’s unaddressed problem of alcohol or substance abuse in the context of co-parenting.

You Must Still Obey Court Orders

While courts focus on prioritizing child safety in co-parenting plans, they expect you to comply with the proper procedures and present solid proof of your co-parent’s risky behavior. 

A seasoned lawyer can help you look into legal options for limiting contact with a dangerous parent. However, you can’t simply withhold parenting time based on suspicion. You could get into serious trouble, and the court may reduce your parenting time.

Document Each Incident of Potentially Dangerous Co-Parenting Behavior

Did your child tell you their other parent pushed, shoved, or slapped them? Write it down and date it. Did your ex-partner send you a text message or voicemail admitting they let the children stay outside until late unsupervised, despite your insistence to the contrary? Save this message.

Keep a personal record of all your ex-partner’s actions that are abusive or could potentially endanger your kids. Then, consult a family lawyer for reliable advice on keeping your children safe.

Dealing With an Unsafe Co-Parent? Call Karen Ann Ulmer, P.C. 

Do you believe your ex is an unsafe co-parent? The skilled divorce and custody lawyers of Karen Ann Ulmer, P.C., can help you handle co-parenting and dangerous parenting, including co-parenting with a narcissist or abusive ex. Call us at (866) 349-4907 or schedule a consultation online.

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A Brief Guide To Appealing Your Divorce

Imagine this scenario: A judge has ruled on your divorce, and you are unhappy with the decision. Is there anything you can do?

In some situations, you may be able to seek a more favorable judgment that allows you to modify the judge’s original decision regarding child custody or support, property distribution, alimony, and debt arrangements.

This article explores the various grounds for divorce appeal and recommendations for challenging unfair divorce settlement findings.

When You Can Appeal Your Divorce

There’s no question that contesting divorce decree provisions is not easy, and you must have a compelling reason to do so. It’s not enough to simply say that you disagree with the judge, or that you feel the outcome is “unfair.”

Instead, you need to have proper grounds for filing an appeal. There are a few ways you can do this. One of the most common rationales for overturned divorce settlements on appeal is that there was some kind of mistake made.

Examples of mistakes include the judge misinterpreting the law, not correctly applying the legal standards, or making an error regarding the facts. 

Other potential grounds for appealing your divorce could be a showing that there was a lack of evidence to support the judge’s findings or there was another problem with the evidence that impacted the judge’s ability to rule fairly. This often comes down to the judge abusing their discretion and making an unreasonable final decision.

Even if you can demonstrate one or more of the above flaws in the case, there is still a final obstacle to overcome before your case can even be heard. You will have to be able to show that whatever the mistake or flaw was, it would have materially affected the outcome of your case.

How To File a Divorce Appeal in Bucks County

Once you have identified the proper grounds for a divorce appeal, the legal process of overturning the initial judgment and seeking a new one comes next.

The first step in this process is filing a Notice of Appeal, which ultimately informs your former spouse that you intend to appeal the judge’s decision. From there, your attorney will prepare the “Record,” which includes the transcripts and documents from the initial proceeding.

Upon completion of this step, your attorney will file an appellate brief that outlines all of your legal arguments. After being assigned a court date, you’ll be able to present your arguments about the grounds for the appeal and the relevant evidence to support your case.

Finally comes the waiting part of the appeals process. This can take several days, and the court may affirm or reverse the trial court’s decision. It’s also possible that the judgment may be modified or the case could be remanded back to the trial court with further instructions.

Contact an Experienced Appellate Lawyer for Divorce Cases

While the goal is to stay out of court so you and your spouse can make all the decisions, sometimes an appeal is necessary. For more information or to begin the appeal process, contact Karen Ann Ulmer, P.C., at 866-349-4907 for an initial consultation.

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Is a Parent’s Home Unsuitable for Visitation? Here Are Some Options

While there is no such thing as a “perfect” home, a child must have a safe, stable, and healthy environment in which to live. If you believe that your former spouse or partner is putting the mental, physical, or emotional safety of your child at risk by not maintaining a home suitable for visitation, keep reading to learn more about your options.

What Really Makes a Home Unfit for Child Visitation?

Whether a home is actually adequate for a child to live in or visit depends on numerous factors. A judge can evaluate if an environment meets the overall criteria, looking specifically for objective signs that the home is suitable, comfortable, and safe for children.

Obvious signs of unsuitability include substance abuse, domestic violence, and physical abuse. In these situations, the other parent can be ruled unfit, and the court can remove the child from the home.

There are also more subtle clues that a parent’s home is genuinely unsuitable for visitation. For example, an unclean, a hoarding situation, or a lack of basic needs (like utilities being deactivated), clearly indicate that the parent is ill-equipped to provide a home appropriate for visitation.

Additional factors may also come into play. For example, if the other parent is neglecting the child or not being responsive to their needs, that could be a sign that the environment is unsuitable. While there can be universal guidelines, many of these judgments may come down to an individual situation based on the age of the child and the current and past rules set by or agreed upon by the parents.

One of the first steps in protecting a child from having to spend time in a home that is unsuitable for visitation is to gather evidence of an unsafe visitation environment. This can involve documenting your concerns and communicating constructively with the other parent.

In keeping with the goal of protecting the best interests of the child, anyone who suspects abuse or neglect can report the situation to Child Protective Services. This initiates an investigation and includes interviews, home observations, and reports, which can be used as evidence in court.

A family law attorney can guide you in pursuing legal actions such as filing a petition to restrict visitation due to unfit home conditions or pursuing child custody modifications due to unsafe conditions. If there is concern that both parents’ homes are unsuitable for visitation, the next step may be to explore alternative solutions such as conducting visitations at a neutral site.

Contact an Experienced Family Law Attorney

Every child deserves to grow up and thrive in a truly safe and healthy environment. At Karen Ann Ulmer, P.C., our law firm takes an empathetic and compassionate approach to resolving child custody conflicts, including those centered around safety.

To learn more about how our attorneys can help you, call us at 866-349-4907 for a consultation.

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When To Consider Parallel Parenting

Studies show that children have better outcomes when they are able to spend approximately 50% of their time with each parent. However, this can be difficult in a contentious Bucks County divorce or when two parents have drastically different parenting styles.

In these high-conflict situations, parallel parenting can be the recommended solution to ensure that the kids spend ample time with each parent, yet the warring parents don’t have to interact much (if at all) with each other.

This article defines the concept of parallel parenting, including when it might be the right solution for divorced parents.

What Is Parallel Parenting?

A parallel parenting situation occurs when each parent makes their own decisions about the children’s care and activities while they are in that parent’s respective custody. In other words, parallel parenting is when you are both parenting, but doing your own thing.

This approach to custody and decision-making is typically recommended when parents do not get along. Parallel parenting is a co-parenting method that minimizes contact between the two parents because each parent has the authority to exercise autonomy and authority within their own household.

Parallel Parenting vs. Shared Custody

In a co-parenting arrangement, parallel parenting is markedly different from shared custody (also referred to as joint custody). With shared custody, both parents work together in regard to important decisions, including education, healthcare, religious upbringing, etc.

By contrast, parallel parenting virtually eliminates this shared decision-making, and communication methods for parallel parenting arrangements may be limited to email, text messaging, parenting apps, shared online platforms (like Google Drive or Dropbox), third-party mediators, and written communication.

These methods of communication minimize interactions between the parents while allowing them to exchange vital information about a child’s well-being.

While co-parenting is ideal, it’s not always practical or healthy. Parallel parenting is good in high-conflict situations. One of the key benefits of parallel parenting for children is that both parents maintain a good relationship with their kids, and the parents don’t have to interact with each other.

One potential downside of high-conflict co-parenting strategies like parallel parenting is that it opens up the door for kids to play the parents off of each other because communication is kept to a minimum.

Benefits of Parallel Parenting

When both parents want to be involved in their children’s lives but cannot maintain a healthy co-parenting relationship, parallel parenting can be a preferred approach.

The benefits of parallel parenting include reduced conflict and tension between the parents and the two homes, better-established boundaries, predictable and established communication methods, lower stress levels (due to reduced contact and arguments), and overall improved co-parenting skills.

While it may be ideal for both parents to cooperate and communicate with each other instead of in parallel, it’s important to consider the impact that ongoing conflict can have on the psychological health of the child.

Contact an Experienced Child Custody Attorney

Navigating parallel parenting, including creating a parallel parenting schedule, can be an important step in ensuring that your children have a healthy and stable living situation. To learn more about parallel parenting, contact Karen Ann Ulmer, P.C., at 866-349-4907 for a consultation.

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Traveling Abroad With Kids After Divorce

Jetting off to Tokyo or Paris has always been on your bucket list, and now that your ex is in the rearview mirror, you make plans to do just that. Not so fast, though. Traveling abroad with a child post-divorce isn’t something you can do on a whim. You’ll probably need to ask your ex for permission to avoid violating your custody arrangement.

Below, learn everything you need to know about traveling after divorce with your child.

Refer to Your Custody Agreement

Before packing your bags, look over your parenting plan. Does it say anything about taking your child out of the country? Many custody plans limit the number of days per year that you can travel internationally with your little one.

If you have sole physical and legal custody, you may not have to ask your ex for permission to travel, but it’s a good idea to at least let them know of your travel plans. If you have joint custody, you’ll need to ask for passport consent.

Should you fail to ask permission before leaving the country, your ex could have you charged with parental abduction under the Hague Convention.

Apply for Passports for Kids After Divorce

If you plan on traveling internationally after divorce, both you and your child will need a passport. You must supply proof of parentage (such as a birth certificate or DNA test results) to procure a passport for children under 16.

If you have joint custody, you must supply a court order that permits you to travel abroad with your young one. You might also need to show customs officials a written statement from your ex that permits international travel.

Note that you may be ineligible for a passport if you’ve been neglecting child support payments. In Pennsylvania, you’re ineligible for a passport if you owe more than $2,500 in child support.

Bring Must-Have Paperwork With You When Traveling After Divorce

If your ex gives the thumbs-up to travel abroad with your child, be sure to bring written permission from them with you. You should also bring copies of your custody agreement and the child’s birth certificate. Never let these documents out of your sight.

What If Your Ex Won’t Play Ball?

Understandably, the prospect of you taking your child abroad might make your ex anxious. They don’t like the thought of missing out on parenting time, and they may worry that you’ll flee overseas and never return.

Talk to your ex to figure out what’s bothering them. You may be able to reach a compromise. For instance, in exchange for allowing international travel, you might agree to give your ex more visitation for the rest of the year.

If your ex still refuses to grant permission, contact a divorce and custody attorney to discuss your situation.

Learn More About International Travel Restrictions After Divorce

Traveling after divorce can be exhilarating, but before you buy plane tickets or book a hotel, you must ensure you can leave the country with your child. If your ex says no, contact Karen Ann Ulmer, P.C., at (215) 752-6200 for a confidential consultation.

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Child Custody: When Your Ex Is Always Late Dropping Off or Picking Up Your Kids

Your ex was supposed to pick up your child three hours ago, but they still haven’t arrived. Not only that but they can’t even be bothered to call you and tell you what’s going on. You’re annoyed, to put it lightly, and your child keeps asking, “Why isn’t daddy here yet?”

Below, a divorce and child custody attorney explains how to handle non-compliance of court-ordered visitation here in Bucks County.  

Why Is Your Ex Not Complying With the Parenting Plan?

If your ex is only late occasionally, that’s understandable. But if they’re always late, they might be trying to annoy you. Some exes enjoy wasting your time and they do it to “punish” you.

“How dare she divorce me?” these people think. “I’ll show her.”

Of course, your ex might just as well have a problem with time management. Regardless, that’s not an excuse to be constantly late for drop-offs and pickups.

Chronic Lateness Impacts You and Your Child

Your child gazes out the window as they eagerly wait for their parent to arrive. Your ex was supposed to arrive at 10, but 30 minutes later, they’re still not here. You try to assure your child that mommy still cares about them. They’re not convinced, though, and you can’t blame them.

Young children can’t understand why mom or dad is always late. It makes them sad and frustrated. They might even feel like their parent doesn’t love them anymore.

Chronic lateness affects you, too. You might be late to work or miss an important meeting because of your ex’s behavior. If your ex’s lateness is impacting your life, call a divorce and child custody attorney for guidance.

How To Handle an Ex Who’s Always Late

If your ex is fairly amicable, you can try talking to them. Simply ask why they’re always late. Maybe they have a good reason. For instance, perhaps they have a new job schedule that interferes with visitation. If this is the case, you might consider custody modification.

Mediation can also help you sort out tardiness. During mediation, you and your ex will meet with a neutral party to find a solution to their chronic lateness.

When Should You Hire a Lawyer?

If your ex doesn’t abide by your custody arrangement and no amount of talking helps, it may be time to call a divorce and custody attorney. Your lawyer can send a letter to your ex laying out the consequences of their chronic lateness.

Should that fail, your attorney can file a motion for contempt of court. A judge may give you more parenting time or fine your ex to discourage further lateness.

Is Your Ex Always Late for Custody Exchange? Contact Our Firm

Your ex may think it’s funny to annoy you by constantly showing up late, but chronic lateness is no laughing matter. If your ex refuses to show up on time, contact Karen Ann Ulmer, P.C.

For a confidential consultation with a divorce and child custody attorney, call (866) 349-4265.

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How To File for a Protection From Abuse/Restraining Order in PA

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Filing for a restraining order — legally called a “Protection From Abuse” (PFA) order here in Pennsylvania — can keep you and your children safe from an abuser. Initially, the process of filing for a restraining order in Pennsylvania may sound overwhelming or confusing. But it actually just involves a few simple steps, and once you complete them, you can gain peace of mind. 

What a Restraining Order Can Give You

You can file for a restraining order against an intimate partner or a family member, including a spouse or ex-spouse, parent, child, domestic partner, or person related by marriage. In Pennsylvania, these orders do not protect victims who experience abuse from a stranger or a person with whom they are not “intimately involved.”

A restraining order or PFA offers these protections:

  • The abuser cannot go near the victim’s home — even if the abuser owns it.
  • The abuser cannot have any contact with the victim or their kids.
  • The abuser will need to turn over their weapons.

A judge may order a restraining order to stay in place for up to three years to protect the victim’s safety. In some cases, a victim can use a restraining order to require the abuser to provide financial support. 

How To File for a Restraining Order in Pennsylvania 

If you are in immediate danger of domestic violence or abuse, you will file for a temporary PFA that will go into effect instantly. A judge will review this temporary order at a hearing and determine whether to order a final PFA. 

This is the process to file for a temporary PFA:

  1. You will fill out a petition: If you are filing on a weekday, go to the courthouse to fill out a petition for a restraining order. If you are in immediate danger on an evening or weekend, call the police; they can provide protection until you file at the courthouse the next weekday. 
  2. A judge will review the petition: A judge may ask questions about your reasons for filing the petition. Then, they will grant or deny the temporary PFA and schedule a final hearing within 10 business days. 
  3. The sheriff will deliver the petition to your abuser: A local sheriff will deliver the temporary PFA order, a petition, and the notice of the final hearing to your abuser. 
  4. You will attend the final hearing: You can have an attorney and/or a domestic violence advocate with you at the final hearing. If you and the defendant agree on the terms of the order, the judge will grant it; if either party disagrees, they will share their account with the judge. Your attorney can provide evidence of why the restraining order is necessary.

Your abuser does not need to be present when you file. However, they can attend the final hearing. 

Karen Ann Ulmer, P.C., Can Help You Through This Process

We understand that filing for a PFA (Protection From Abuse) can be scary and overwhelming. Our compassionate attorneys at Karen Ann Ulmer, P.C., are here to guide you through the process and provide legal representation. Contact us today at (866) 349-4265 for assistance filing for a restraining order. 

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Is Your Divorce Attorney Using AI?

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Artificial intelligence has the potential to streamline many rote tasks across virtually any industry. If your divorce attorney mentions that they have begun using AI to aid certain processes, you may initially feel a little wary—and rightfully so. If they aren’t careful, your attorney’s use of AI could negatively impact your case. 

Review these considerations for divorce attorneys using AI.  

Ways Your Attorney Could Be Using AI in Your Case

Recently, attorneys across numerous practice areas have begun using AI to aid their research and documentation processes. In theory, AI could help attorneys save time. However, because the divorce process is very sensitive, using AI could lead to serious mistakes or violations. 

These are a few ways your attorney may be using AI and they may not be a good idea. 

Creating Documents

AI software can help divorce attorneys draft property settlement agreements and other legal documents. The attorney just needs to input the agreement’s details, and the software will turn it into a full-length legal document. 

However, AI doesn’t have the same legal training as an attorney, and it may unknowingly generate a document that is not legally binding. Inputting a client’s personal information into this type of software could also violate client confidentiality, as you never know what software companies do with such data. 

Predictive Analysis

Predictive AI makes predictions based on past data. Many lawyers have begun using this technology to analyze datasets or legal cases and identify patterns. For divorce attorneys, this type of AI could help with analyzing a client’s assets and looking for potential discrepancies.

Of course, predictive AI isn’t 100% accurate. Attorneys need to be careful to check the facts generated by AI to ensure that they are legitimate and trustworthy. 

Ethical Considerations for Using AI in Divorce Cases

Some divorce attorneys remain wary of using AI because of its inability to adhere to ethical standards. Artificial intelligence does not consider ethics when completing tasks. Instead, ethics are human creations. 

Because of this fact, AI does not have the capacity to determine what is ethically “fair” for divorcing couples, or to consider morals when drafting documents or coming up with suggestions for attorneys. Divorce attorneys using AI need to be careful not to violate ethical standards. 

Potential Pitfalls of AI in Family Law

AI tools are still relatively new and are nowhere near foolproof. This technology has several limitations that attorneys need to keep in mind:

  • Inaccuracy: AI can generate completely false information and present it as fact.
  • Security risks: Like any virtual tool or platform, AI platforms are vulnerable to security breaches and hacking.
  • Emotionless: AI does not feel human emotions and eliminates the humanity within legal practices.

Contact Karen Ann Ulmer, P.C. for Reliable Divorce Assistance 

If you feel unsure about your divorce attorney using AI, you aren’t alone. AI may not be reliable or accurate enough for usage within serious legal processes.

At Karen Ann Ulmer, P.C., our family law services and legal advice are completely human-led. Contact us today at (866) 349-4265 for a divorce consultation.

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Alimony and Child Support: Lump-Sum vs. Monthly Payments 

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Divorce, alimony, child support, and lump sums — many people struggle through the details and consequences of these systems as they pursue a legal separation or divorce. 

In many marriages, one spouse earns more than the other. The higher-earning spouse may have relied on the other spouse to hold a less time-consuming and lower-paying job and do more of the household tasks. Similarly, one spouse may have given up career growth to be a stay-at-home parent and save the family money on childcare costs. 

When these couples divorce, the higher-earning spouse is often responsible for some form of spousal support. This support can help the other party maintain their living standard while pursuing education and career growth.  

The amount and timeline of alimony payments depend on several factors, including the length of the marriage. In some cases, higher-earning spouses can be responsible for paying permanent alimony to their spouses. 

Child support is intended to financially support a child, not the adult. There are several types of alimony and child support payment plans. Whether you should advocate for lump-sum or monthly payments in your court case depends on specific considerations. 

Benefits of a Lump-Sum Payment 

Guaranteed Money 

A lump-sum payment could be a wise choice if your ex-spouse is unstable or has a history of money trouble. It can eliminate the monthly stress of not knowing if your ex-spouse will make the required payment.  

Protects You Against Your Spouse’s Future Financial Troubles 

With uncertain financial times, there is no guarantee your ex-spouse will be able to continue making the agreed-upon monthly payments. Their business may go under, or they may make bad investments. A lump-sum payment ensures you will not be affected even if your ex comes into major financial trouble. 

Support Your Future 

Perhaps you have a major financial goal. Maybe you want to open your own business, buy a house, or go back to school. A lump-sum settlement can help you make that investment stress-free without waiting to receive alimony payments. 

Benefits of Monthly Payments 

Most of the benefits of lump sums are best suited to couples negotiating alimony. Many attorneys do not recommend a lump-sum payment for child support payments and instead recommend monthly payments. 

Best Interest of a Child 

Child support is designed to support a child’s basic life necessities, like food, housing, and education. Because these necessities remain constant throughout a child’s life, monthly payments tend to make the most sense to support a child’s best interests. 

If you have concerns about your ex-spouse’s ability to commit to monthly child support payments, an attorney can help discuss your options and rights. 

Contact an Experienced Attorney 

Divorce cases are challenging enough emotionally. Adding in the stress of negotiating spousal support and child support payments can feel very overwhelming for many people. An experienced legal team, like the lawyers at Karen Ann Ulmer, P.C., can help you answer any questions you have about divorce, alimony, child support, and lump sums.

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Your Family-Owned Business and Divorce

Married couples tend to mix many elements of their lives: friend groups, finances, and hobbies. Some couples go even further and mix their relationship with their careers by running a business together. 

A family-owned business requires unique considerations during a divorce — the two parties aren’t just spouses; they are also business partners. The team at Karen Ann Ulmer, P.C., can help you navigate these legal challenges. 

No Prenup or Postnup? 

The best way to mitigate stress and contention over a family-owned business in a divorce is to create and sign a prenuptial or postnuptial agreement prior to the divorce, agreeing on how the two parties will divide or trade all assets. 

If you do not have either of these documents, you must determine an equitable division of assets during the divorce process. This can be much more challenging, so we recommend hiring an experienced attorney to help you through negotiations. 

Unique Challenges of Family Businesses and Divorce 

Business interests are always tricky to navigate in a divorce, especially if the business owner is the sole income provider. However, a family business owned by both parties presents its own set of considerations. A court must first determine whether the business constitutes marital property and is thus subject to equitable distribution under Pennsylvania law. 

To make this determination, a judge will consider factors like the funds used to start the business and the business’s value before, during, and after the marriage and divorce.  

Who Owns the Business? 

It is crucial to have a complete understanding of who owns the business to determine whether it is a marital asset. For example, if a trust or a previous generation owns the business, and neither party technically owns it yet, it follows different rules for property division. 

Inheritance 

If one party inherited the business or received it as a gift, even during the marriage, the business is considered separate property, not marital property. Additionally, if one party may receive a portion of the business as an inheritance in the future, that portion also counts as separate property. 

Alimony and Child Support 

Many people wonder how the income from a family-owned business will be divided after a divorce. If you are pursuing a divorce, you can use your ex-spouse’s salary for alimony and child support settlements. 

What If the Business Goes Under? 

Some people try to continue co-owning the business after a divorce when considering the division of assets. Others opt to receive a business valuation and have one partner buy out the other’s portion. If you choose to do this, you can receive a lump-sum payment upfront and avoid any financial repercussions if the business goes under. 

There are always complicating factors when pursuing a divorce. Tied-up assets, like co-owning a business, can make an already-challenging process even more complex. Reaching out to a trusted divorce attorney from Karen Ann Ulmer, P.C. can help you navigate dividing a family-owned business during a divorce with confidence. Call or email today. 

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