How Can I Legally Change My Name?

If you are going through a divorce, you can legally change your name through the divorce process. There is a separate procedure for name changes that are not divorce-related. As long as you meet the requirements and the paperwork is in order, it should not be a problem.

As Part of a Divorce

You can regain your maiden name during a divorce. Under Pennsylvania statute 54 P.S. § 704,

“Any person who is a party in a divorce action may, at any time prior to or subsequent to the entry of the divorce decree, resume any prior surname used by him or her by filing a written notice to such effect in the office of the prothonotary of the county in which the divorce action was filed or the decree of divorce was entered, showing the caption and docket number of the proceeding in divorce.”

In New Jersey, you could retake your maiden name as part of the divorce or afterward.

  • You should include your request in the initial complaint.
  • If you do not do so, you can later change (or amend) the complaint to do that or seek the change by verbally asking the judge before they finalize your divorce.
  • If you continued to use your spouse’s last name after the divorce was final but changed your mind later, you could file a post-judgment motion with the court. There is a filing fee, but this is simpler than the process for a civil name change.

Outside a Divorce

If you are not getting a divorce, there are some limits to changing your name or that of a minor child:

  • It must be for a legitimate purpose.
  • You cannot have certain criminal convictions, such as voluntary manslaughter, murder, rape, statutory sexual assault, involuntary deviate sexual intercourse, aggravated indecent assault, sexual assault, or robbery.

The petition for a name change would be filed with the civil court in your county. There is a filing fee, and you will need copies of your fingerprints which you can get at the local police department. There should be a hearing for the petition within one to three months after filing.

Before your hearing:

  • A notice will be published in the local newspaper of general circulation and county law reporter.
  • There will be checks by the Prothonotary’s office for any pending civil matters, the Clerk of Courts will see if you are facing criminal charges, and the Recorder of Deeds will look for property issues you are facing.

If you are seeking a name change for a minor child:

  • The same publication requirements apply.
  • You must prove you served the petition on the other parent.

If the other parent disagrees with you, the court will decide the issue after a hearing with both parents. To succeed at the hearing, you must convince the judge the name change is in your child’s best interests.

What’s Next?

Once you have a signed/certified order granting the name change, head to the agencies and companies you deal with:

  • Social Security office
  • Department of Motor Vehicles
  • Banks
  • State and federal taxing authorities
  • Your insurance agent
  • Utilities
  • Stockbroker
  • Internet/phone service provider
  • Employer

This is part of re-starting your life with a new name.

EXPERIENCED CHANGE OF NAME LAWYERS

Work with an experienced family law lawyer from Karen Ann Ulmer, P.C., with an in-depth understanding of the Pennsylvania and New Jersey statutes and court procedures. We can help make the process go as smoothly as possible. Call us at (215)752-6200 or book a consultation online now.

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Should You Change Your Name After Your Divorce?

If you changed your last name to your husband’s when you married, you might be considering changing it back to your maiden name after your divorce. Depending on your situation, there are pros and cons to a name change. 

Fresh Start 

Dropping your ex-spouse’s name creates a firm break from your past married life. Taking your spouse’s name symbolized you were one unit. Changing your last name shows you are no longer emotionally, legally, or financially connected. You are independent, and your marriage is over. If you are having a difficult relationship with your ex-spouse, it may be additional motivation to change your name. 

Does Your Maiden Name Reflect Who You Are? 

You should be proud of this new, post-divorce you. You are not the same person you were during your marriage. Life after your divorce is a new chapter. Changing your name, where you live, and even new clothes may be part of your emotional makeover. 

Will a Name Change Cause Confusion in Your Professional Life? 

If you work professionally, own a business, or are successfully moving up in your industry, you have a personal brand you need to maintain. You want people to think specific positive thoughts when your name comes up in conversation, or you meet them. Changing your name can confuse those you work with or connect with.  

However, this change should be manageable. Businesses often rebrand themselves, their products, and their services. Do you drive a Nissan? Back in the day, it was a Datsun. Blue Ribbon Sports is now Nike. Divorces are common, and changing your name is not something negative. Consider making it positive by creating a reason to reach out to these people, give them an update, and engage in a conversation.  

Will It Impact Your Children? 

You could change your last name, but your children could have their father’s last name. If your kids are young, maintaining your ex-spouse’s last name may be more practical and easier. You can always change it later. 

Which Name Do You Like More? 

Do you have a preference? You might not like your maiden or married name for many reasons. It may be very long, difficult to spell, or not very flattering. You might not have enjoyed being Ms. or Mrs. Butts, Crump, or Gopnick. You may be tired of spelling out “Krzyzewskewicz” to people. You have options. 

Changing Your Name and Bill Collection 

Some people leave their marriages deep in debt, and if they have been out of the workforce for a long time, their job and income prospects might not be good. Bill collectors use many methods to find debtors. As part of the name change process, you will need to publish a notice of your name change. Thanks to that notice, the internet, the amount of publicly available information about you, and special databases used to find people, going back to your surname will not help. 

If you have questions about the name-changing process, call us at (215) 607-2893 or fill out our online contact form. 

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Divorce Settlement Mistakes You Can Make Without an Attorney

Can you write your own divorce? Do you really need a divorce attorney? People hire attorneys because they need help with something they do not feel comfortable doing themselves. Most of those getting divorced should retain legal counsel to protect their rights. We provide advice and counsel to educate our clients and propose courses of action. 

Our attorneys want to prevent mistakes because that is one way we provide value to our clients. It is up to our clients, not us, to decide what direction to take, but if they follow our advice, they reduce the risk of making errors we want them to avoid. 

Most divorce cases settle. For nearly all parties getting divorced, litigation consumes too much time, energy, emotion, and money. The resolution to your divorce will probably be an agreement that will impact you for the rest of your life. It must be in your best interests as much as possible. 

What Divorce Settlement Mistakes Can I Make? 

  1. Do Not Just Settle 

Divorce can create a lot of stress and you may want to put it behind you. We can do that depending on the circumstances and how well the parties cooperate. But the assets you have, any children involved, and the cooperation of your spouse, will all impact how long it will take to reach an agreement. Your spouse may use your urgency against you and propose unreasonable terms hoping you will quickly agree. 

  1. Tax Implications Are Not Considered 

Not all assets are alike, and there are tax implications to the equitable distribution of property. Some assets may be taxed higher than others, impacting their value. If you do not know about tax issues, you may agree to a property settlement that, after taxes, is worth significantly less than what your spouse will receive.  

  1. You Want to Keep the Marital Home. Can You Afford It? 

If you own a house or condo, keeping it may be a goal for many reasons. You may see it as worth giving up your rights to other property to attain it. Is this goal reasonable? Create a post-divorce budget.  

  • What will your expenses and income be?  
  • Will you be able to refinance the mortgage? If so, what will your payments be? If not, what is your Plan B? 
  • Will you be able to pay the utilities, mortgage, insurance, and taxes?  
  • Will you be able to set aside money to pay for future repairs and maintenance? 

Everyone needs a home, but will this one make you so property-rich and cash-poor that you will be forced to sell it after your divorce? 

  1. Your Spouse May Hide Assets 

A complete inventory of the parties’ marital assets is the foundation of fair, equitable property distribution. Do not agree to a settlement if you believe your spouse is dishonest and may be hiding assets. If there are ways he or she may be siphoning off or mislabeling assets, we can get to the bottom of it so we can have clear, reliable information about the property the two of you own. 

Contact Karen Ann Ulmer, P.C., today if you are thinking about getting divorced and have questions or if you have decided it is right for you and need legal representation.  

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Hiding Marital Assets: Do the Numbers Add Up?

Divorce in New Jersey and Pennsylvania involves the equitable division of marital assets. If one spouse wants to keep more than their fair share, they may resort to hiding assets. This not only goes against family law and court procedures but, depending on the circumstances, could lead to criminal charges. So, how do you know if your spouse is hiding assets from you?  

We see the best and worst in divorces. Some couples understand they are no longer a good match. They amicably and respectfully work with each other and go their separate ways. On the other end of the spectrum are those who see divorce as a battlefield where rules don’t apply to them, and they will do all they can to come out ahead. These are the people who hide assets. 

What is Marital Property? 

Marital property includes the property either spouse acquires during the marriage or with funds earned during the marriage. It also consists of the increased value of non-marital or personal property up to separation. It is not always clear when an asset is marital because couples may mix personal and marital assets during the marriage. 

What is the Equitable Distribution of Marital Property? 

Part of ending a marriage is equitably, or fairly, dividing marital property and debts. This does not mean assets will be evenly split. Usually, part of negotiating this issue will involve alimony payments. One spouse may be willing to get fewer assets in exchange for higher alimony or vice versa. Pennsylvania statute spells out several factors to be considered when dividing marital property.  

Why Would a Spouse Hide Marital Property? 

The spouse may try to keep as many assets as possible by misclassifying marital property as personal or hiding assets, so the other spouse does not know about them.  

How Could a Spouse Hide Marital Property? 

Their efforts are only limited by the spouse’s imagination. It is easier to do if the spouse owns a business, the couple has a lot of assets, or the spouse manages the family’s financial matters. Some common ways to shield assets include: 

  • A spouse may try to move cash from personal to business accounts if they own a business. The spouse may try to delay large contracts until the divorce is complete. The company may create “ghost” employees who do not exist or bogus expenses or asset purchases. What would appear to be a business expense is transferring money into bank accounts controlled by the spouse. A business could also make a fake loan to an entity that is just a front for the spouse. 
  • Money and other assets could be transferred to family or friends.
  • A spouse may set up investment accounts and buy stocks or other investments in their name only and not tell their spouse. 
  • Physical assets like cars, artwork, or jewelry may be undervalued. If the other spouse accepts these estimates as accurate during the negotiation and the person keeps them, they are getting more value than they deserve. 

If your spouse has lied to you about other aspects of their life, the fact they are hiding property should not be a surprise. 

How Can We Find Hidden Marital Property? 

If you have worked on as many divorce cases as we have, you develop an awareness of how a less-than-honest spouse may operate. Hiring a forensic accountant can be a good investment if your finances are complex or a business is involved. 

Our most important information source is you. You can tell us about your family’s income, assets, and family-owned business. You can supply us with copies of documents establishing your family’s assets and your tax returns. 

During conversations with your spouse or while negotiating a divorce settlement, you need to tell us if what we are told does not make sense. There is no point in dealing with a spouse acting in bad faith. 

After the divorce complaint is filed, we can request information and documents from your spouse and their business. We can ask them questions during a deposition. Information and documents we obtain could be sent to an accountant for analysis. 

Are There Penalties for Hiding Assets? 

If a spouse is violating court rules and orders, a judge could take action in response. They may order the offending spouse to pay a larger share of their assets than if they acted honestly and order that they pay for our investigation and attorney time spent uncovering hidden assets. 

The police could get involved if your spouse went so far as to commit crimes like forgery. If a spouse secretly makes money “off the books” without paying taxes, state and federal taxing agencies might be interested. 

If you have any questions about equitable division or believe your spouse is hiding assets, please contact us here at Karen Ann Ulmer, P.C. We can discuss this and how we can help you through the divorce process.  

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What is a Child Custody Evaluation? How Does It Work?

If you and your child’s other parent cannot agree on a custody and visitation plan here in Bucks County, a judge may order a child custody evaluation. It involves a mental health expert, usually a psychologist, who will evaluate your family and recommend a custody/visitation or parenting plan to the court. It is not something to fear, but you should understand and prepare for it.  

What is a Child Custody Evaluation? 

After gathering and evaluating information about your family, the evaluator will recommend a plan to the parents and the court. The parties may have evaluations done; the court will order one with an evaluator of their choice, or both. 

Ideally, you and your ex-spouse will use the recommendation to reach an agreement. If not, the judge can use the evaluation and other evidence to write a custody/visitation order for your family.  

What is the Evaluation Process? 

Not all evaluators use the same process, but there are certain things you should expect in your evaluation. They include: 

  • Two to three interviews with each parent 
  • At least two interviews with each child 
  • Observations of the children with each parent 
  • A review of court filings and other written information 
  • Contact with other sources (therapists, pediatricians, teachers, daycare staff) 
  • A written report recommending custody/visitation rights and schedules addressing the significant concerns raised by the parties 
  • Possible psychological testing or questionnaires about your emotional functioning or parenting style 
  • A visit to each parent’s home 

Be cooperative and facilitate the evaluation the best you can. 

What Should I Tell My Children About This? 

If they do not already know, you should tell your child that there are conflicts between the parents and that they have different views about how much time each should spend with the children. The evaluator is involved to learn more about the family, help them reach a resolution, and suggest ways they can be better parents.  

You should reassure your child that both parents love them and that they will both be part of their lives. You should also tell your kids to bring up any concerns they have, ask questions, and honestly answer those posed by the evaluator. 

How Should I Approach the Evaluation? 

We will discuss it before the evaluation takes place and prepare you for it. You should ask us any questions you have. The evaluator wants to understand your family, its dynamics, and relationships. You should relax as much as possible and be honest. Your job is to talk about yourself and describe the situation as it pertains to what is in your child’s best interests, not to put on a show for the evaluator. 

Be open and honest. If asked, do not be afraid to say negative things about yourself or your parenting skills. But put your situation in context. Tell the evaluator what you learned and how it helped you be a better parent. 

Be open and honest about the other parent. If you just criticize them, the evaluator will not think you are being honest or credible. It is best to be truthful, even if that includes saying positive things about the other parent.  

If things about them concern you, say why, and discuss specific incidents or occurrences that support your feelings. Just accusing the other parent of being too angry or controlling without anything to back it up will not help you. To the best of your memory, give specific reasons why you have certain fears or feelings about the other parent, given that the outcome should reflect your child’s best interests. 

Get the Help You Need From an Attorney You Can Trust

If you are considering a divorce or filing for custody of your child, call our office at (215) 608-1867. A custody evaluation may be part of the process. We will explain it, help you through it, and use the recommendations to help you achieve your goals. We can speak over the phone, via a teleconference, or meet in our Doylestown or Langhorne offices. 

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You Thought It Would Be Over, But the Abuse Continues

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You suffered abuse while you lived together. Now you are separated. You might be going through the divorce process, or you have completed it. You have taken multiple steps to put this nightmare behind you. But your ex just can not let go of degrading or demonizing you.  

The Abuse Can Happen in Many Different Ways 

The abuse may have gotten worse since the separation. If the two of you have kids, they may be part of this brutal play your spouse stages. Your ex may: 

  • Belittle, undermine, and criticize you at every opportunity. 
  • Expose your children to unsafe situations or people who cause you fear and concern. 
  • Use intimidation, threats, violence, ridicule, and manipulation to force the children to comply with their wishes. 
  • Prevent your child’s social interaction to maintain control.  
  • Stalk you physically or electronically by bombarding you with emails, calls, threats, and abusive messages. 
  • Physically confront you at your home, in a public space, or at your workplace. 

The abuse is only limited by your ex’s imagination and what they think they can get away with. 

What Can I Do About It? 

Document what is going on. Keep text messages and emails. Take screenshots of abusive social media posts. Write a journal and describe what is happening, how you are responding, and the stress and pain you are enduring.  

If you are harassed in person, use your smartphone to (as discreetly as you can) record conversations. To be legal, both parties must consent to phone calls being recorded. You can use an app to record what is being said on a call, but your ex must be told about it. They may hang up or not care, and they will continue the verbal abuse. If your ex comes to your home, you can set up security cameras to record what they are doing and when. 

If your children are sucked into this tornado, we can help you seek sole custody and, if we cannot end visitation, limit it and ensure that a third party supervises it. If there is no custody order, we can start the process. If there is one, we can ask the court to modify it. Your chance of success increases with more extreme and better-documented behavior. 

Judges decide custody and visitation issues based on a child’s best interests. Being subjected to this kind of behavior and language is harmful and damaging, not just now but potentially for the rest of their lives. 

If you feel you or your child is in danger, you have been threatened, struck, sexually abused, or your spouse refuses to leave your home, call the police. Provide them with images, videos, photos, and journal entries to establish what is going on and for how long. If there are witnesses, name them and provide contact information.  

Although a prosecutor can proceed with a domestic violence case without a victim’s cooperation, it rarely happens because it is so difficult. Follow through, file the reports, and cooperate with the police and prosecution. If your ex sees criminal charges result from their words and actions, they should come to their senses. 

We can help you file a protection from abuse order. Through the order, you may gain temporary custody of your kids, which will require your ex to stay away from you wherever you are. 

Compassionate Advocacy From Lawyers Who Care 

If your ex is abusing, stalking, or physically assaulting you, we can help. Call our office at (215) 515-5172, book an appointment online, or fill out our contact form today. We can meet in our office or speak with you by phone. 

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How to Get Along With Your Ex

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One benefit of divorcing your child’s parent is that there is no longer the pressure to maintain your marriage. But you should strive to get along well enough to co-parent your children. That is a much less demanding and intense relationship than being married. You do not have to keep up appearances, your kids should understand the situation, and it is much more of a working relationship. 

Sometimes Time Does Heals Wounds 

Here are three reasons from Psychology Today why your relationship could improve: 

  • If the person’s role in your life declines, long-standing frustrations may disappear. You will still be incompatible, but since you are less dependent on each other, those issues are less important.  
  • Over time and with life experiences, everyone changes, including you and your ex. The two of you may become better people who have an easier time getting along. 
  • Instead of seeing yourselves as trying to escape each other, you both see the common goal of raising happy, healthy, well-adjusted kids. You appreciate there are more benefits of cooperation than antagonizing each other.

Your relationship was bad enough not to be married. That does not mean that, as ex-spouses, you cannot work together to be good parents. Your bad marriage may have stressed the two of you out and distracted you so much that your parenting ability suffered. The two of you may be better parents post-divorce. 

Steps to Take to Improve the Relationship 

A divorce is a significant change in your life. The two of you will not instantly lock into doing, saying, and thinking things that will smooth out your relationship. Another Psychology Today article suggests some options:    

  • Be patient. Give each other some time and space to adjust. 
  • Keep your priorities straight: parenting happy and healthy kids, not settling scores or trying to run your ex’s life. 
  • Have a mature and respectful relationship with your ex. If you are still too upset to communicate, use a third party as a go-between.  
  • Lower the heat by refraining from accusations and keeping your voice under control. The past is over. Focus on the future. Look at this as a mature, business-like relationship whose purpose is to achieve goals. 
  • Do not use your kids as pawns in a mind game you want to play with your ex. It will hurt your relationships with your kids and ex. 
  • If you start a new relationship, do not rub it in your ex’s nose. Keep your new partner out of whatever disputes may arise with your ex. 
  • Do not put down your ex in front of others, especially your kids. Be an adult. Move on 

Do not allow uncomfortable feelings about your marriage to rule your life and make you and your ex less effective parents. Learn from the past and take steps now so everyone can have a better future. 

Get Help if the Situation Gets Out of Control 

Most divorced parents work it out and responsibly parent their kids. If your ex is not adjusting to the post-marriage reality and making you and your kids miserable, we can help. If you have any questions or want legal representation, please contact us here at Karen Ann Ulmer, P.C.  

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Divorce and Your Parents’ Money: Does Any Belong to Your Spouse?

With divorce comes the equitable (or fair) division of marital property (property acquired during the marriage). Generally, assets owned by a spouse’s parent are not considered marital property, so your spouse should not have a valid claim to them. But this is divorce law, so there are possible exceptions that may make your case complicated. 

How Would Equitable Division Impact Past Trust Payments or Gifts? 

Clarifying which property is marital and what is not is spelled out in Pennsylvania statute (35 Pa.C.S.A. §3501(a)). Under the law, generally, property that is a gift from your parents, directly or through a trust fund, would not be marital property as long as you treat it as separate, personal property:  

  • Non-marital property: You put it in a bank account with your name, your spouse cannot access it, and you spend it for personal reasons. You buy yourself a car with it or spend it on furnishing your home office. 
  • Marital property: It is in a joint account, used to purchase marital assets or to pay ordinary marital expenses. 

Also not marital property is money you manage for your parents. If you are spending it to benefit them and your spouse has no access and it has not been used for marital purposes, that property belongs to your parents.  

How Would Alimony Impact Future Trust Payments or Gifts? 

The property you receive after your marriage ends is not marital. A spouse cannot have a claim on a future inheritance, trust fund payments, or gifts from parents you have not received yet as marital property. However, if your spouse is awarded alimony, you may need this future income to pay it. 

If you used commingled past trust fund payments and gifts and paid joint living expenses and property with it, they helped you establish your standard of living. If your spouse seeks spousal support or alimony and you agree to it, or a judge orders it if there is no agreement, one of seventeen factors is the standard of living the two of you established during your marriage.  

The fact that you improved your standard of living during your marriage by commingling trust payments and marital income may end up aiding your spouse’s argument that alimony should be paid. You may spend future trust fund payments on alimony, so indirectly, your spouse may end up with part of those future payments. 

Another alimony factor is the “expectancies and inheritances of the parties.” Alimony amounts can change in the future if there are “changed circumstances of either party of a substantial and continuing nature whereupon the order may be modified, suspended, terminated or reinstituted or a new order made.”  

A future inheritance is not marital property, but if you receive an inheritance so large that your circumstances have changed in a “substantial and continuing nature,” your ex-spouse could ask a court to obtain alimony or increase payments after that happens. Like trust payments, though a future inheritance is not marital property to be divided, your spouse may get some of it through increased alimony payments. 

On the flip side, if you receive alimony and after your divorce get the benefit of sizable trust fund payments, gifts, or an inheritance from a parent, your ex-spouse may ask a court that their alimony payments be reduced or ended because you no longer need financial support given this extra income you have received. 

Equitable Distribution and Alimony Issues Can Get Complicated. Let Us Unravel Them for You.

Contact Karen Ann Ulmer, PC, today if you are considering getting divorced and have questions or have decided it is right for you and need legal representation. Call us at (215) 752-6200 or fill out our online contact form. 

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Locking Down Your Life from Your Ex

Divorce is about change and moving from the marriage that dominated your life to a new chapter. You and your spouse were connected in many ways. Whether you are in the process of divorcing or it is already behind you, you must take steps to be more independent. This is especially true if you have a difficult spouse who may use information against you.  

Should you have keys to each other’s homes?  

Probably not. There are the occasional, genuinely friendly divorces, and you may want your ex to have a key to your home in case of an emergency (or you lose your keys). However, this is generally not a good idea because it creates the possibility of dangerous situations and stalking by someone with whom, in the past, you shared a deep connection. Even someone who seems to have taken the divorce well may harbor serious grudges that could play out in what you think is the security and privacy of your own home. 

Should I allow my ex in my home? 

If you are both parents and want to, at the very least, maintain the appearance of civility, you could allow the other parent to come in momentarily to pick up your kids. If the relationship has broken down, that can be done outside or at a neutral site.  

If you do not want them in your home, clearly communicate that. If they drop by just to annoy (or worse, threaten) you, document what is happening. You could also install security cameras because a picture is worth a thousand words. We could have a protective order put in place if needed. If they are threatening or stalking you, get the police involved. 

Should I change my passwords? 

Yes, especially if the app or website concerns financial matters. Creating a new email address may also be a good idea. If they know the email address you use, unless there is a two-step identification process, they may be able to change your password and lock you out of the account.  

Not only might your spouse access social media accounts and post embarrassing or spiteful content, they could also steal your money. You could lose your job if your ex, using your accounts, posts racist ramblings on LinkedIn or sends a resignation email to your boss. It is a mess you would rather prevent than try to clean up afterward.   

Should I get a new job? 

Many of us meet future spouses at work. We may marry business partners. This may have worked for a time, but keeping your professional and business lives separate during or after a divorce may be too much to ask. 

If you co-own a business, there should be an ownership agreement spelling out how one party can sell their interest to fellow owners or others. Leaving a job you love or one with a lot of potential may be necessary if it is impacting your performance.  

Should you or your ex leave? That is a discussion worth having. Your ex may be more willing and able to go than you, or this may become another test of will to see who can outlast the other (which could get very ugly). 

How many connections should I break? 

You may have any number of things in common. You may volunteer for the same charity, belong to the same religious organization, or like the same neighborhood restaurant. How far you need to go to move on in your life depends on you. Not everyone needs to reinvent their life, but you should make necessary changes to move on after a divorce.  

Contact Karen Ann Ulmer, PC, today if you are considering getting divorced and have questions or have decided it is right for you and need legal representation. If your ex is threatening or stalking you, we can also help you put that to an end. 

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Your Divorce Team

A divorce can be an emotionally difficult time. A supportive network of people can make it easier to manage and help you start your new life. Every team needs a qualified attorney and others who will provide you with emotional support and practical help. Here in Bucks County it can be helpful to have the following individuals on your team:  

Who Makes the Team? 

1. Your Attorney 

Your lawyer is the captain of your team, the trainer in your corner. There is no more critical teammate than the one guiding you through the legal process. It is our job to ensure your legal rights are protected and put you in the best possible position to start your new life. 

Without an attorney, or by retaining one who is learning while they work on your divorce, you could create massive problems for yourself and your kids now and in the future. This process is too complicated, and there is too much at stake to have no attorney, or the wrong one, on your team. 

2. Therapist or Counselor 

A divorce could be one of the most stressful events in your life. However, with the right team on your side, it need not be. A mental health professional can provide you with a confidential and safe space to talk about your feelings and work through your challenges. They can also offer strategies for managing stress and coping with difficult emotions.  

3. A Support Group 

Joining a support group of people who are also going through a divorce can help you connect to others who understand what you are going through. It may be a huge relief to know you are not the only one thinking your thoughts or feeling your emotions. They can support you emotionally and provide you with practical advice on how to handle current and future issues.  

4. A Divorce Coach 

Divorce coaching is part of the larger profession of life coaching. A divorce coach focuses on separation, divorce, and life after divorce. A good divorce coach can help you make sound decisions before, during, and after your divorce, set and achieve goals, and cope with this significant change in your life. 

5. Family and Friends 

Some friends and family members will be better at helping you than others. The better you know and trust the person, the more likely they will be helpful to you. Not everyone will be good in this role, so choose wisely.  

They should be someone you can turn to for emotional support and who will listen to you. Choose someone supportive and nonjudgmental and with whom you feel comfortable talking about your feelings and experiences. Someone who has also gone through a divorce may be particularly helpful.

If you have young children, someone who can help with childcare could greatly help. Having an attorney, divorce coach, support group, or therapist is great, but if you cannot meet with them because you do not have someone to look after your kids, they will not do you much good. 

The attorneys and staff at Karen Ann Ulmer, P.C., understand how difficult a divorce can be. We are privileged to have our clients rely on and depend on us during this critical time. They trust us with this life-changing event, and we work to earn that trust every day. 

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